Inside my Mind

First Heartbreak?

Went through my old journal again

I see you standing there with your friends laughing and flirting with others yet here I am just looking at You not doing anything to get your attention...

Damn why did I have to be so insecure about myself... sure I may be ugly and fat but that shouldn't stop me from being me... I thought

Suddenly I got the confidence to talk to you one day it went well You laughed at my jokes I laughed at yours I thought for just a second that maybe just maybe You liked me too... How wrong I was...Yet so naive I was

We became friends later that year I thought you liked me so I became more confident for You...
soon my friends became your friends your friends became my friends we would all hang out and have fun...

One day in lunch you sat with me my friends teased me your friends teased you too we sat alone in the corner I'm pretty sure we were both red like tomatoes...We didn't speak we just sat their in silence...
You moved to sit next to me you poked my cheek then put your head down you peeked your head out from your arms you were blushing harder if it was possible... We then began to play with our sleeves swatting them at each other I laughed at our silliness... I wish I new that was our last moment

A week passed... You didn't talk to me I didn't either because I didn't want to burden you...
The next week passed You greeted me like nothing was wrong I was relieved that you weren't mad at me...The next day you sat down in front of me in lunch we talked for a good while but I noticed something off about you but I brushed it off...
Then A guy sat next to You he touched your arm You saw he immediately You turned Red and smiled like an idiot The both of you started talking and laughing like you both were the only ones around eventually the both of you got up and went to another table And left me Alone...

For the first time someone made me feel special and that was You... you were the first person that didn't call me Fat Nor Ugly
I was confident for awhile because Of You...

You Were My First Heartbreak...

Damn 6th grade just wasn't my year guys😂I was a fucking broken 12 year old God Allysus