a letter from cancer // kevin kantor

this is one of my favorite spoken word poems i have ever heard; a letter from cancer by kevin kantor. the most popular performance of this is him speaking at CUPSI 2015. i was shown this by my sister, and i have been in love ever since. this poem is so raw and open, it puts a new perspective on it all. and "it" is cancer.

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a letter from cancer:

dear lover, these buzzing fluorescents have you..looking a little pale, just a little washed out. and all this antiseptic is far from complimenting that perfume, this linoleum will make your most stylish pair of pumps look cheap-

sweetheart, you look..tired. i'll never understand; how it is that you don't see it. how terribly beautiful you are, i mean, look in the mirror. i'm in all the dark spots, the hollowed slopes. in your eyes, and beneath them your color is just so delicious..

listen. to the sound of my voice, to these..sweet nothings, i will love your everything. every multi-colored malignancy, raw, and heaving--

breathe with me! bleed out with me! we will waste away together--hush now.. i will hold you, through these tremors.. it's just the way that we dance, baby!

listen: to this music. this mutation, so orchestral. this spreading, so symphonic. split cells 2 by 2, by 4 by 4, watch our love swell-

lover, why do you want me dead? i will show heaven, baby~ give you the stars, and the sun--

those are sunspots on your lungs. you can't just..tie a ribbon around me and cough me up. hah, really now? did you think i'd go that easy? that i'd ever think to up and leave you-

rest, darling, lay down. you know how i love to lazy river through your shattered glass veins; your heart is just as big as they all said it was, but not as strong.. all of that feigned..pride, pumping-

i know that poker face all too well. you will love me, i gave you my sun, love me- deadly i'll make you an angel, love me--i will make you feel radiance.

you'll meet me there, in 9 months, or 6 months, or 3; they'll try to time stamp our love, expiration date us. but take your time, i'll wait for you-

quiet, and patient, until you wake up one night with a stich in your side or a wasp in your brain, and you will know-

i've come back for you. i will always come back for you. darling, we will look so beautiful laid out with all of the wilted lillies

they will weep for everything that you were and everything you could never be without me-

lover, it is my understanding that you want me dead. fine, die with me.