I Solemnly Swear That I am NOT in Love With Lily Evans

Chapter 9

Dear Evans,

I might as well call you that now. Because we're back to where we started.

But I miss you, sweetheart.

I miss your smiles, your laugh and those gorgeous green eyes of yours.

And every time I see you it just makes me feel more and more sorry for what I did. I was a dickhead to you, Lily. And I'm so sorry. I'm still kicking myself for hurting you.

Please, give me another chance. Talk to me again. Be my friend again.

Your poor, hopeless, arrogant dickhead,

James

James leant back in his chair, re-reading the words he'd just written, and sighed. If only he was as good at romance as he was in his classes.

He ran his hands through his hair, gritting his teeth, his eyes stinging with unshed tears.

And fuck it all, Christmas was in two days time. Why did she have to pick right now to go and get mad at him?

~

"Prongs...hey, Prongs, wake up…" James groaned and lifted his head off his arms, his back and neck stiff. What in the name of Merlin had possessed him to fall asleep at his desk?

It was dark outside; the firelight flickered on the walls, and his friends' shadows danced eerily.

"What'd I miss?" James mumbled sleepily.

"Prongs, we've called a little meeting." Sirius asked him, eyes glinting mischievously. James smiled; his friend looked almost spooky in the flickering firelight, shadows dancing over his face.

Sirius continued, waving his hands around in a magical, mystical sort of way, smirking as he did so. James shook his head at his friend. Next to him, Remus chuckled, and Peter laughed nervously from his armchair, where he crouched with his knees up to his chest.

"Well, we've got a little something to discuss...concerning a lovely red-head."

"Go on." James gestured with his hand for Sirius to continue, but Remus interjected.

"You lost the bet, mate."

James' mouth fell open.

"What? No, I haven't- we said Christmas Eve!"

"Well, Jamesy boy- look at your watch, and you will see it is precisely 24 past one in the morning, December the 24th." Sirius sang, his eyes glittering joyfully. James glanced at his watch, feeling a sinking feeling in his stomach. His friend was right. He'd lost the bet.

"Wait- how long was I asleep for?"

"About ten hours. And- what's this?" Sirius grabbed the letter he'd written to Lily from his pocket and waved it around in James' face. "It seems she's not yours…"

"Give that back!" James snapped, and lunged for it, snatching it roughly from Sirius' grip.

"Have it your way. But-" Sirius and Remus coughed meaningfully and held out their hands, palms up.

"Yeah, yeah, ok. I'll pay up tomorrow." James sighed in defeat, putting his head back on his arms, clutching the letter to his chest.

The Marauders disappeared back up to their dorm, leaving James alone.

Tears leaked from his eyes as he watched the fire, the flickering tongues of flame looking remarkably like Lily's gorgeous, flowing hair. There was no escape from the pain in his heart.