Recollection

RECOLLECTION
xiii.i.xvi

Everybody's tied-up fixing their stuff on their designated bivouac as we arrived on the said convent. Some have small bags, like wow! All of their necessities fits in that bag? Amazing! And some have big bags, portmanteau and backpacks like me. I together with my circle of friends are busy setting up our clobber on the closet when suddenly a bell rings thats signalling us to go down the stairs since the session is about to start.

As we gathered at the session hall, the retreat masters started the programme with a short prayer and by encouraging us to sing and dance some praise and worship songs. It was fun indeed. Some laughed, others screamed, and many are jumping while singing. The room was filled with blissfulness.

Few moments later, the retreat maven called the presidents of each class to say thank you, sorry, and I love you to their classmates. Everyone blubbered, reminiscing all the memories that they've shared with their classmates and realized that we only have four months left before this school year ends.

But then the whole throng is screaming and teasing at someone. My heart begins to beat faster and faster as the crowd's cheering him to go up at the stage and seeing the speaker signalling him to get the microphone and speak. He's there. He's already there. He's ready to speak. And my heart is about to explode.

"To my fellow classmates, I just wanted to say sorry because sometimes I can't do my responsibility as the vice president of the class. I'm sorry if every now and then you guys feel like I'm much closer and cozy to my co-CAT officers. You guys are my family. And the ones who gave me the real sence of the term 'friendship'.

Thank you guys, for all the memories we've shared. Those priceless smiles, those corny wisecracks. Haha. I will treasure them all.

However, I also wanted to thank my CAT family for always being there for me. For giving me counsel especially in times of difficulties.

And lastly, I want you all guys to meet my bestfriend,

The mob is screaming as my heart beats faster and faster. They're all looking at me and shouting with joy.

Raine.

The horde is screaming again and some are about to destroy their chairs out of joy. Gosh! everyone's looking at me now. Even the retreat masters and my teachers are looking at me.

First of all, thank you, for the five months friendship that is filled with joy, late night conversations and even crying moments. Thank you for always being there for me. And sorry, sorry if lately I'm keeping a distance between us.
I'm sorry.
I'm really sorry.

Raine, I told you before that I,
I love you.

The crowd is shouting! they're all looking at me. I can't unriddle what I'm feeling right now. My friends beside me are teasing me and I almost died because of their punches.

Raine, I wanted to tell it again personally.

Raine, I love you.

I really love you."

Again and again, the crowd is shouting as they stare at me. He ran down the stage and gave me some flowers. The crowd is screaming and almost destroyed their chairs. My teachers and the retreat masters are so happy aswell. They're also cheering us together with my schoolmates. I can feel the pressure. I don't know what to say. I-I'm just staring at him and the only phrase that slipped out of my mouth is 'thank you'.

The crowd is screaming. They're happy for the both of us. They thought everything's alright. But it's not. Everything's not fine.

For now, we can't be more than friends.

For now, let's just focus on our studies.

For now, you should love yourself first.

I don't want to harm you.

Please,

I'm feeling the same way.

Believe me.

But, I don't want to ruin your life.

Maybe we can make it happen.

Not for today,

But soon.