25 Days Of Christmas: AmeTralia Edition

Watching A Classic Holiday Film

"We're watching what?" Kyle called out from the kitchen as he was making popcorn.

"A Christmas Story." Alfred responded, getting the DVD player ready to start.

"Why are we watching a movie about the birth of Jesus? England drilled that story into both of us."

"No, not The Christmas Story, A Christmas Story. You know, the one where the kid wants a BB gun!"

There was silence. And then Kyle could be heard groaning.

"This is just because I teased you about your sweater, isn't it?!"

Alfred grinned. "Maybe!"

Once they had settled down with their popcorn, Alfred hit play. He knew that despite the bitching and complaining, this movie was one of Kyle's favorites, as much as it was his.

And soon enough he was proven right when Kyle leaned over and delivered the line along with the narrator in the movie. "In the heat of battle, my father wove a tapestry of obscenity that as far as we know is still hanging in space over Lake Michigan."

Alfred grins. "Sounds about right for England, doesn't it?"

They spent the rest of the movie quoting back and for at each other.

Alfred: "I CAN'T PUT MY ARMS DOWN!"

Kyle: "I triple dog dare you!"

Kyle: "The Bumpus hounds! Da da da da dah da!"

Alfred: "Fra-gi-lay. Must be Italian."

Kyle: "I think that says fragile, dear."

Alfred: "A major award!"

Alfred: "The old man loved bargaining as much as an Arab trader, and he was twice as shrewd."

Kyle: "My old man's spare tires were only tires in the academic sense. They were round. They had once been made of rubber."

Both: "Oh, fudge! Only I didn't say 'fudge'. I said the word. The big one. The Queen mother of dirty words. The 'f, dash, dash, dash' word. It was all over. I was dead. What would it be? The guillotine? Hanging? The chair? The rack? The Chinese water torture? Mere child's play compared to what surely awaited me."

Kyle: "It was... soap poisoning!"

Alfred: "I have since heard of people under extreme duress speaking in strange tongues. I became conscious that a steady torrent of obscenities and swearing of all kinds was pouring out of me as I screamed."

Alfred: "Aunt Clara had for years labored under the delusion that I was not only perpetually four years old, but also a girl."

Kyle: "That Christmas would live in our memories as the Christmas we were introduced to Chinese turkey."

As the movie came to a close, Alfred smiled. Kyle had been up pretty early this morning talking to his kids over the phone, and it was becoming apparent as he began to nod off at the close of the movie.

Outside, it was snowing again. Alfred smiled as his boyfriend fell asleep on his shoulder. He used the remote to turn off the TV, and then grabbed a blanket and spread it over the both of them.

This year would go down as the Christmas he prayed Kyle would agree to marry him.