Amaranth

2.

I don’t want anybody to think that I hate that or that I see something bad in this. On the contrary, I couldn’t wish for better parents than Tarja and Tuomas. It’s been 10 years since they divorced, that was the reason Tarja left Nightwish. She pursued her solo career, managing to bring me up at the same time, coping perfectly with everything. Before I met Aleksi and Anna, she had been(and still is) my best friend, I tell her everything and I absolutely can’t lie to her (even though I’m really good at lying, but not with Tarja). My life is hard only for one reason, I’m tearing apart between two people I love the most. It’s difficult, constantly having one of the parents out of country on tour for 8 months and only being able to see them a few times. If someone only knew how much I miss them on those occasions! But I’ve gotten used to this, it’s their job, it’s exactly what makes them happy. I’ve always dreamed that when I grew up, I would be just as successful as they are and doing what I love, just like them. Tarja has always told me to pursue my dreams and fight for them, or I will never achieve anything, the most important is to never give up. She has always helped me and supported me, would it be with singing, painting, writing or playing piano. Though, she is strict, sometimes too much, but never gets angry without a reason. I like her strictness the most in her. Thanks to that strictness I’m now who I am.
Whenever Dad is in Finland, I spend every weekend at his house, having the time of my life there. Tuomas is the opposite of Tarja, he’s softer and permits me everything. We joke together and go to bars together. I absolutely love staying at his house when all members of Nightwish are gathered together. We stay up until it’s very late, either singing or playing. Sometimes, they tell the stories from their tours and I listen, absorbing every word. As for lying I talked about, I can’t lie to him either, I’ve tried that several times and he caught me on every occasion.
I’ve never liked talking so much about something, so let me finish and put this straight once again: I have the best parents, these two are the most precious people for me.
Since childhood, I’ve been used to being in a centre of attention. It’s not easy being a daughter of two successful people, especially if they’re divorced. In every interview interviewers are trying to talk about you, your name is everywhere, everyone is trying to get either a photo or a piece of information about you. Despite of Tuomas’ and Tarja’s efforts to keep everything private, journalists still manage to find something, turn it inside-out and in the end, write a big fat lie.
Yeah, I’m used to everything that comes with being well-known and easily recognized without your own will, including all the hate and envy. At school, you can’t really guess who’s gossiping about you, who’s trying to befriend you because of your parents and who envies you. And oh their looks, their irritating empty looks that follow me around – I’ve had enough of them already, Sometimes I just want to shout at them and tell them all to go to hell but guess that wouldn’t help anything. Of course, I have lots of friends at school too, not only Anna and Aleksi but these two are special, our relationship is not mere friendship, it’s something deeper and more serious, both of them are like siblings to me.
To be frank, that’s how it all seems, but everything’s more messed up in my mind, or maybe I’m making it more messed up with my endless thoughts. I don’t know.

We sat until midday, reading and doing some tests, until all three of us were close to falling asleep on the books. Aleksi brought me coffee but even it didn’t manage to wake me up.
“Maybe I wanted coffee too.” Anna looked at him angrily. I avoided her glance and continued reading.
“You didn’t ask.” Aleksi gave back.
“Neither did Olivia.”
Aleksi fell silent, then turned to her after two minutes, as if wanting to say something, but thought of nothing and sat back, lowering his head. I felt him looking at me but decided not to notice.
“I’ll go mad if we don’t leave this place.” I groaned, put my books in my bag and we went out of the library.

“Hey what are your plans on prom?” He repeated the question again. I huffed, rolling my eyes and turned to him.
“You know I hate such things, our classmates dressed up in those ugly dresses…” I shifted uncomfortably, remembering my experience at the last school party, it was one huge nightmare. “Besides, Anna hasn’t mentioned it yet and let’s not speak about that, maybe she won’t remember it at all.” I finished and smiled awkwardly.
“I thought you’d like it.” Aleksi pointed at the poster and I followed it. “It’s exactly our theme. ‘Dark Night’, apparently, that’s all their creativity can do.” He said and grinned, somehow it seemed that he really wanted to go, I couldn’t let him down so I turned to him with a smile and nodded.