Seas of Regret

Chapter 2

My mother walks into the room in the Justice Building and sits next to me on the blue velvet couch. Silent tears stream down her face.

I have only seen my mother cry once before, when the Capitol won the final battle of the Dark Days and executed any rebels they could find, along with their families. My father and brother willingly turned themselves in to save my mother and me. Would they have done that if they knew they were letting us live through the horrors of the Games?

We sit in silence until my mother pulls out a beautiful pearl bracelet.

"Will you wear this as your token, Mags?" I agree to wear it in the arena, even though it is so flawless that I am afraid of scratching it or losing it.

"Where did you get it?" I've never seen it around the house, and we are poor compared to most people living in 4. Even fresh fruit is a luxury for us.

She closes her tear-filled eyes, recalling some distant memory, and replies, "Your father gave it to me." With that, she wishes me luck and walks out of the room, leaving me alone with my thoughts.

Unable to stand the silence, I slip out of the room and down the hall to where Dylan is. I'm sure it is against the rules, but I have to see him before we get on the train. His family is just leaving as I walk in.

My bottom lip quivers as I stand in front of him, and my hands shake with... Fear? Anger? I don't even know anymore. I walk over to him, each step weak and unsteady.

"Dylan, why did you volunteer, you IDIOT?! You know that there can be only one victor and that we can't both survive and and and.... and that if I live, you have to––" I start to cry, letting out large, heartbroken sobs that fall to my feet and wet my flats. He wraps his arms around me, like he did on the beach. But other than that, this is nothing like sitting on the beach. We could both be dead in a week. Even in the unlikely event that one of us is the victor, whichever one of us it is will have to live without the other, mentoring future tributes until death.

"Don't cry, Mags." This makes me sob even harder. How many times more will he comfort me before one of us is gone forever?

"I volunteered for that boy because I couldn't volunteer for you." He says, stroking my hair. I make some sob-filled argument about at least one of us dying in the arena, to which he replies, "I didn't want to stand by and do nothing while you had to fight 23 other people. If you die in that arena, at least I'll be there for your last moments. I want to be there with you... Because... it might be the last time I’ll ever get to see you. And if I die, I want the last thing I see to be you." I keep sobbing. Brave, righteous, stupid Dylan. Why couldn't he have just cheered me on while sitting at home, safe and sound?   

And yet I don't want to do this without him. I don't want to fight other tributes out of the reach of those strong arms, unable to see his sea green eyes. Gradually, I stop crying, and Dylan wipes my cheeks dry. By the time Eustacia and a few Peacekeepers come to take us to the train station, I don't look like I had an emotional breakdown anymore. Dylan and I smile and wave at the cameras, and we board the train.