That Moment

       He stood at the centre of stage. Waiting for music to start. He was standing where he started as a teenage boy with dreams to own the sky. There were thousands of people in front of him , all of them shouting & cheering. The atmosphere is full of energy and happiness. Its filled with anticipation of what he was going to do. He remember standing on this very stage only couple of years before waiting for that one announcement that would change his life & make his dream come true but instead he heard bad news. They lost. He & his band lost. But that didn't matter now. Even when they lost , he achieved every one of his dream. He touched the peak of success that was beyond his imagination. His mum was so happy. So proud of her son. After all she seen those dreams with him and stayed with him while he worked hard to get what he always wanted.
       He toured for solid 5 years worldwide, sold 5 albums with no 1 iTunes ranking, earned in millions , got recognized all over the world , even got compared to legends in music industry but all this success took toll on him & his band members. They all were tired , emotionally drained, exhausted & little bit sick of whole thing. They wanted a break. His mum was the one who supported him when they decided they need this. She always been his pillar. She was always there for him to lean on for awhile when he gets tired. When he was on tour, he got homesick pretty often. He would then just grab his phone & dial his mum's number. She would talk to him for a long time & that would put him to ease. For this reason he got teased a lot by boys even on camera in interview. But he never mind that. Because he knew his boys were just doing it good naturedly and even if people end up thinking he is momma's boy so be it. He loved his mom way too much and was not afraid to show that to world. He always hoped whatever he did will make her proud of him & thank the heavens he always did. If only she was here today............
      He didn't wanted to think about it. Not while he was going in front of whole world but somehow he couldn't control the negative thoughts from entering his mind. He mind raced back to the start of year when he was happy. His band finally took the break they wanted. It was difficult because the fans kept thinking they are not going to come back. They all had to keep reminding them that no matter what, band will be back together. His family was ecstatic to have him home. He remember the few lazy days he spend with them. They all laughed & joked & had such a good time.
       He was able to be with his girlfriend and was able to give her his time & attention she deserved. He became father this year and couldn't be more happy though he would have been great with negative things media was saying about him & his son. He was on top of the world. It felt like life couldn't get any more better. But he should have known that bliss wont last. His mum was ill all the time so they took her to hospital. Doctor ran different test on her and though all of them were hoping to get good news. They didn't. His mum had leukemia. A cancer.
       When he heard that it felt like the world stopped for a minute. It was huge shock for all of them. He couldn't handle that fact. They were all miserable but not his mum. Johannah deakin is..... was a very strong woman. She told them to stop being miserable and go on with their life. None of them could do that but they agreed with her. Yet louis could not just erase that knowledge from his mind that he is loosing his mum. He knew he cant have his mum by his side all his life, a silly part of him wished that it will be so. Hence he couldn't wrap his mind around the concept that his mum has cancer.
      He tried to be with her and make things easier for her but the cancer is spreading faster than anything imaginable. His mum was in so much pain. Even when she tried to hide it and stay strong & happy for him & his 6 siblings especially his father. It was hard for his stepfather to handle this. Dan loved his mum very much. He made his mum happy & that's why he respected that guy so much. There were few days when his mum looked good & healthy. On those rare days , it was easy to imagine everything was alright & there isn't deadline looming on her life. But those were very few.
     Her health was degrading day by day. She has been in & out of hospital for lots of time. And he felt very bad for it. He had so much money on his hands but none of it useful when it came to saving life of his mother. He was going through a very bad phase of his life. His emotions all over the place. Nothing seemed to make sense & everything felt like its out of control. He lost his appetite and his sleep. He was wide awake so many nights unable to stop thoughts causing havoc inside his head. It reached to point where he started looking ill. The fans & media all over the globe started worrying for him thinking he is the one who is ill. It became unbearable. And he didn't know how to get that out of his system so he turned to only thing he has ever known. MUSIC.
      Taking pen & paper , he poured all his emotions in a song. Every doubt and sorrow. His fears. But the song was too sad for him yet he didn't want to change its lyrics for they are one of the most truthful things he had written. They were part of him. He wanted to make that sound little less sad yet didn't know how. that's when he met steve oaki. That guy was genius with tunes. Together they came up with very upbeat song that will make people dance if they ever heard it. It was one of the best song he has ever written. His family was first one to hear the complete song & their reaction were the one he would never forget. It was happy , tearful, sad , proud and every emotion known to man.
        After that he spend every minute of his time with his family , his mum, his loved ones & his friends. But all that time wasn't just enough. He was there when his mum's condition got worse where they knew she wont make it & he had been there when she left all them. The pain was unbearable. He never thought such kind of pain existed. The one that make you forget everything else and consume you completely. He knew he lost his mother & everything stopped making sense but he knew one thing . He have to perform his song "Just Hold On " on x factor final as it was his mum's last wish. And he will do that no matter how much it is going to hurt.
       The news with his mum's death along with news of his performance spread like wildfire in world. Some people were understanding sending their prayers yet some thought he was seeking attention using death of his mum while it hurt like hell to know people might think like that, for first time in his life , he didn't give a fuck what people thought of this. It was between Tomlinsons. He practiced for the song just days after his mum passed away. All of his bandmates were coming to see & support it & he appreciated having them. Niall , liam , harry and their family , lou all flown in to support him. His own family was there. All the people who held importance in his life were there whereas the one person who he longed for wasn't there with him.
      While being surrounded by those people in green room , he got news his song was released. He didn't care if it was or not but it was important for his career that before performance his song was released so he agreed and his management dropped song.
       The familiar tunes of his song started, shaking him out of his trance where he took trip down memory lane in mere few seconds he was standing on stage. He gripped mic in his hand and got ready to give one of his best performance for that one person who gave him life. He sang pouring his heart in song. He danced across the stage to beat of song. But his voice shook thick with emotions and his eyes filled with tears. He held those back, not letting single tear drop from his eyes. He gave everything in him to that performance.
      When he stopped singing , the cheers and. applause of thousands filled the space still unable to make him fill good. He heard simon  “I’ve known you now for six years. What you’ve just done and the bravery…I respect you as an artist, I respect you as a person.” Simon continued, “You know, your mom was so proud of you Louis. She’s watching down on you now and you’ve done her proud.”  Those words touched his heart because that's exactly what he wanted. As getting off the stage , he couldn't help but blow out kiss to his mum towards the sky in hopes of conveying his love. He was trying to tell her even if he is hurting at the time, he would be alright. And he knew she will always be looking over him.

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Hello lovely people,
     I wanted to write this since I saw louis perform. I had wandered what must be going on in his mind at that time & wrote it down. I dont know what kind of response i will get. I hope this is not too stupid. I hope you all enjoy reading this. Please leave your feedback. I love to hear from you. Also I dont like the title & cover of this piece. If anyone has better ideas please comment & if anyone can make me cover , I would love that
I am also on twitter @_MystryGirl You can tweet me.
All the love,
- A