BURNING OUT - (SKAM)

1

"Eleanor, you can't just walk out of here without listening to me!"

As she abandoned her home, and made her way through the front door, refusing to look back, she slipped into a jacket. 

Tears fell down her face.

With blurry eyes, she examined the jacket for a moment; it wasn't hers, that much she knew. It wasn't familiar in the slightest. No one, in particular, came to mind as her eyes inspected its rough appearance. It was worn - aged over time, but, it wasn't important. It was nothing more than a jacket left closest to the door of the house she ran from.

"It's not that I don't listen, Will. It's that you don't say anything. You refuse to talk to me. You leave me in the dark, but keep everything bottled up inside until, eventually, you explode. Then you lash out and say too much. And you know who always gets hurt? Me."

The city streets were busy. Yet, despite the hoards of people out and about, it didn't change the fact she was alone.

"This isn't about just you, El? It's about us! It's about what we're going to do today, and tomorrow, and the day after. It's about our future. Okay? I'm sorting everything out; our rent, school, groceries, and everything else we need. This is more than just you." 

Eleanor wandered aimlessly. 

She walked the streets, beneath streetlights, and passed restaurants with lines out the door. Cars drove past with music turned all the way up. Friends laughed together in their groups as they made their way through the night, one club at a time.

Then she had an idea.

"Please don't turn this on me. I know you're doing everything, but that doesn't give you the right to turn around, shut me out, and resent me for it. I just want to help you, Will. You can't do everything yourself. That's not fair. Let me help."

Eleanor jumped on the late-night train. 

As crowded as the streets, the train was packed with people she had no business being around; some were pissed drunk while others just finished their shifts at work on their way home to see their families. 

Seats filled up by the second on each carriage. She tried to find a seat but eventually gave in to a small older woman, which left her to hold tight to one of the nearby poles.

"Life isn't fair, Eleanor. That's just the way it is. If you haven't figured that out yet, get used to it. If we want to have a roof over our heads, and food on the table, I have to stay focused. I have to be in charge of these things because if you get distracted, or stuff up it's over. We lose everything.

Flashes of her fight only moments ago caused her to take in deep breaths. 

It was the past. The past stays in the past.

She needed to give her mind rest more than anything. 

A simple party. 

That was it. 

She planned to just dance away all her problems, at least until the next morning.

"You're the one that forgot the bill. You didn't pay it. That's on you. Why is it suddenly my fault we're going to lose everything?"

The train pulled to a stop. 

Her feet carried her to the location she vaguely knew of; a hole in the ground. 

"Don't."

Places to hide away in and refuse to see the light of day again, but she owed herself the decency to at least show up to the party everyone was apparently going to; a group of second graders was talking about it in the courtyard. Even if no one was specifically waiting for her arrival.