better than revenge // jaylos

chapter twenty-three

warning: mentions rape
carlos
Jay's words echoed through my head as I got in my car and drove away from Jay's house -- which I surely wasn't going to be visiting pretty soon. I didn't understand why he could just tell me the truth! Was it so hard? I mean, maybe he didn't want to tell me because he just doesn't love me anymore. He lied everytime he told me he loves me. I was so stupid.

He told me that his whole plan was going to be better than revenge, but all he did was cheat on me and ate all the food in my kitchen. I sighed and rested my forhead on the steering wheel as I stopped at a red light. I should have just kept on walking instead of stopping at the gasoline station, that way I wouldn't have met him.

Though he impacted my life more than I thought he was going to, and for that I'm qrateful, but I need to put him aside in my thoughts and life. I drove into the parking lot of my house, Ben's car parked there as well. I ran my hand through my hair and grab my phone and open the car door, step outside and slam it shut. I dig through my short pockets and get put my keys, climbing up the pavement steps and shoving the key into the lock, twisting it to the side and pushing the door open with force.

I find Ben sitting at the couch, attempting to pet a growling Dude, who looks like he's ready to attack him. I smile and kick the door close with the heel of my foot. Dude runs over to me and scratches at my feet, I pick him up and rub him behind his ear, earning a bark in response. "Does he not like you?" I ask Ben, getting Dude a treat while trying to balance him in my hands. I feed it to him and set him on his plush bed, wriggling a toy in his face. He brings it into his mouth and starts playing with it happily.

"I don't think so. Everytime I try to pet him he growls as if he's going to bite my hand." Ben says, sounding exasperated.

I laugh and grab a pack of pop tarts, ripping the package open and popping them into the toaster, pressing the ledge down and waiting. I go back into the living room and plop down on the sofa next to Ben. Dude watches me and jumps up onto the couch, curling into my side. "Look," Ben states, extending his arm and going to pet Dude. Dude starts growling and opens his mouth, capturing Ben's hand in his sharp teeth, munching down on it. Ben shrieks and tries to get his hand out from the dog trap -- literally -- but fails when Dude bites down even harder, making Ben scream even louder.

"Dude! No!" I grab Dude's jaw and force him to release Ben's fingers, making Dude growl and hop of the couch, pattering of. I look at Ben's hand, which had started bleeding. He hisses in pain and leans his head back against the pillows. I stand up and grab Ben by the hand that wasn't bleeding and pull him to the kitchen, instantly grabbing the first aid kit from the bottom counter and popping it open, grabbing the rubbing alcohol and cotton ball, along with a long white bandage.

I pour a bit of rubbing alcohol onto the cotton ball and grab Ben's hand, "This might hurt a little," I warn before dabbing the cotton ball onto the bleeding part of Ben's knuckles. Ben hisses and stomps his feet, throwing his head back as I continue. I grab the bandage and wrap it around his hand, tying it and cutting off the excess. "Better?" I ask.

Ben nods, "It just stings really bad."

"Yeah, that'll pass soon, but it's all to stop the bleeding." I state, putting the things away. I bend down and put the kit back where it was, sighing. A pair of arms wrap around my waist and I jump at the sudden sensation. I want to scream Jay, but it's not Jay at all. It's still Ben. I look back at him and notice he has his chin resting on my shoulder now.

"Where did you learn that?" He asks, examining his hand.

"My mother taught me it... incase something happens to her and she can't take care of it." I pursed my lips and look at Ben, who's smiling now. "That's nice. Thank you." He says. I smile, "No problem." I pry myself away from his grip and turn to the toaster, grabbing by pop tarts and resting them on a napkin nearby. I let them cool off and grip the counter, trying my best to stay sane.

Ben grabs my wrist and spins me around, pressing me to the counter. I furrow my brows and give him a weird look, "Can I help you?" I ask.

Ben shrugs, "Well, I just want to thank you for stopping the bleeding. It doesn't sting as much now that you've saves me."

I chuckle, "You're welcome. Now, let me eat my pop tarts, because a hungry Carlos isn't a nice Carlos." I say, grabbing a pop tart and biting into it, regretting it as soon as my mouth fell the hotness. I gasp and start fanning my mouth, but Ben continues to talk, not even caring about my own problem. I swallow the pastry and take a deep breath as if a grand weight has been lifted off my shoulders.

"And to thank you for saving me from the bleeding, I think I should give you a suprise. That pop tart won't be the only thing in your mouth." He winks, giving me a terrible smirk.

"Um, no thank you. I'm fine." I say, patting his shoulder. I grab the napkin and walk myself up the stairs. Ben, once again, grabs me by my hand and turns me around, making me drop my napkin. "Ben! My pop tarts!" I snap, bending over to pick them up.

"That's not important, babe. What's important is what I'm going to do to you when we get up the stairs." He whispers.

"I said no!" I yell, "Now pick up my pop tarts or else you're going to go buy me a new pack!" I shove him. He growls and grabs me by my arm, dragging me up the stairs. "Benjamin! What are you doing!"

He turns the corner and opens the door to my room, shoving me inside and slamming the door shut. He takes off his shirt and throws it on the ground, pushing me all the way to the bed and climbing on top of me.

"Ben! Get off! I don't want to do this!"

"Shh," He places a finger on my lips, "You know you want to, babe. You don't have to fight it."

"Ben, this is rape!" I shout, fighting under his grip.

He starts to remove my clothing piece by piece, leaving me naked. Somehow his clothes have been discarded as well and he's ready to shove his little peanut inside of me (I should've known Jay wasn't lying about that thing).

I snap back to life and realize I'm about to get raped.

I'm about to get raped.

......
AW HECK NO

WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME WHY DID I EVEN WRITE THIS I'M AN IDIOT

but that's how the story goes!!!!

next chapter will be better but still sadder

-a♡