WALKING AWAY FROM THE REPUBLIC ▷ GENERAL GRIEVOUS

봄날

DISCLAIMER: The events and some characters (Ronderu lij Kummar, Bentilais san Sk'ar) mentioned in this one-shot are taken from General Grievous's Legends backstory which is no longer canon by 2014. The lyrics (in bold) and themes are taken from a new song by BTS, 봄날 (Spring Day).

I̶ ̶w̶a̶n̶t̶ ̶t̶o̶ ̶s̶e̶e̶ ̶y̶o̶u̶ ̶a̶g̶a̶i̶n̶.̶ I miss you.

These words echoed in the chambers of my mind and flitted through the hollows of my bones. I miss you. They do hurt, but I let them linger in my heart for a while as a cool breeze trapped in an empty shell, whispering of the ocean when I placed it gently on my ear. An old tale told in winds and waves.

You were the ocean, Ronderu. A wild enigma. A pure gift flowing from place to place. Free and boundless, knowing no home, no allegiance, no tribe. You were the calming water to my raging flame. You could drown me with your might if you wanted to, but I trusted you, and into you I poured my thoughts, my secrets, my insecurities一every fibre of my self worth. I would bare myself cold and shivering and vulnerable before you and you would return my words with subtle, but meaningful gestures. You understood. Soon, your heart took the shape of my own, accepting me and all my flaws (and I accepted you, too).

Your comrades revered you. Your enemies feared you. I remember your golden eyes shifting from place to place with a certain fierceness rippling on the surface. Placid, but never truly calm. A whirlwind of dual Lig swords would rouse you into tempestuous waves, crashing into beaches and rocks with a fury worthy of the gods, claiming the souls of reckless fools who dared to cross your path. Carcasses of dead Huk lie in your wake. You were the giver and taker of life. Fluid, always changing, yet somehow remained the same.

You were made from things ancient and ethereal. A fleeting dream of spring day, someone I once thought would shatter and disappear if our fingers brushed together. You were bursting with provocative confidence but at the same time too jaded for your age. Your intimidating gaze held a dark undercurrent of melancholy; a blossoming young woman with the scars of a being as old as time. I never learned why, but I still admire you and your undiscovered depths. You were my ocean, Ronderu.

Maybe that is why the ocean called you back home.

They called us twin demigods. You and I were two halves of a whole. My long-ranged attacks complemented your short-ranged ones (and we completed ourselves in many other ways). We were invincible when we were together. But that day, you slipped from my grasp and flew too high.

We were fighting on the beach, together but torn away from each other by a maddening blur of green carapaces, swords and spears. I held my breath, aiming for headshots with my slugthrower rifle, water crawling over bloodied sand reaching for my feet while you fought on an abandoned platform, high against the blinding sky.

The Huk invaders had managed to overwhelm your defenses. You had nowhere to run. Your twin swords clashed against waves and waves of barbed shears. You were worn down, wounded, cornered, steps away from nothingness. I could have saved you, but一

A brief scream pierced the air and you were gone.

The Kaleesh kolkpravis emerged victorious. Everywhere, praises were sung to the god of war, but I felt not at peace. When the tide of battle subsided and the fallen were left to burn, I closed my eyes and dove into the Jenuwaa sea. The belly of the ocean had swallowed all light, but I swam deeper, deeper, deeper, hoping for a glimpse of you in murky shadows, caring not even when salty brine seeped through my bandages, digging into my injuries.

Shallow breaths scraped raw against my throat and specks of stars darted past my face but you were still gone. Fellow warriors of the kolkpravis seized their khan by the shoulders, trying to pull me back to land, but I struggled against their grip, kicking around in the water. Let me find her, I screamed. Please.