Salamanders

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* bus driver pulled over to the side of the road*
Bus driver: "You guys need to stop being so loud! I can't concentrate on driving if you're screaming"
* 10 minutes later*
me: "ma'am with all do respect even though I don't think I have any for you. Could you do your job and get me home before six? So put your foot on the gas pedal and keep it there this time."
* starts driving."

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