Bad Guy Gone Good (BOYXBOY)

The New Normal

Chapter 14: The New Normal

Today was Sunday. Alec and I had just woken up, after a ridiculously chill day, yesterday. We literally did nothing but lie in bed all day. I got up and went straight to my bathroom, not even bothering to put on some clothes. The tension was a bit high after what happened. We didn't go out of my room, my mother placed two plates of food in front of my door yesterday and we didn't have to go out to use the bathroom since it was linked to my room. It was cold since I had opened the windows, our smell had filled the entire room, so it was either freeze or suffocate. It was slightly snowing outside, yet still sunny, the small snowflakes lightly landed on the edge of my window.

As I entered the bathroom and went straight to the shower I heard Alec's beautiful deep voice sounding from my room.

"Alex? When are you done showering?" He asked, his voice loud enough for me to hear it.

"Jesus, Alec. I just got in? You should've said something if you wanted to go first" I shouted back. Then as I turned on the hot and cold water, I saw him entering the bathroom and going towards the toilet next to the shower, he pulled his junk out of his boxer shorts, which were my boxer shorts actually, and peed. I turned around to face the wall instead of him peeing. I heard him flush, I closed my eyes as I poured shampoo on my hair. The warm water flushed down my body, a rush of goosebumps flashed through my body.

"Do you mind closing the door behind you, the wind from the room is freezing" I asked, not opening my eyes. I heard no response, just the sound of the door close. It was quiet, which was why I got a huge shock when I felt two cold hands around my waist. As the water had soaked us both his hands became warmer, he entered the shower and pulled my body closer to him, I could feel my back pressed close to abs. He wrapped two hands around me, capturing me. He placed his chin on my shoulder and placed a sweet kiss on my cheek.

"Let's do something fun today" he said.

"Alright, do you have anything in mind?" I responded.

"No, not really, I just want to spend time with you." He said, I could feel him smiling against my shoulder. I nodded.

"Okay." I said, holding his hands and closing my eyes, resting my head on his.

***

Alec and I decided to go to the park. It's always so quiet and peaceful in mid winter. Parents and kids have often gotten tired of the cold and then they start staying inside. And as we arrived at the park it was as predicted. Empty. Well, it wasn't a very big park, but still it was peaceful, and Alec was glad that we came here.

We walked a while before we reached my favourite bench. It was old and rusty but I loved it. It was placed in the center of the park and a decent amount away from everything, all the fun, so instead you had a nice view to it. 

I wiped some of the snow away from the bench so we could sit, luckily there wasn't a lot. It was cold, but not as much anymore, it was worse in the first two months of winter, now it wasn't that bad anymore. It was getting warmer, but not enough to only be wearing a warm sweater or hoodie. I was wearing my usual hoodie and black jacket. He was wearing almost the same except his jacket was a bomber jacket. He looked good, his hair was was hidden under his hoodie, but his eyes were shining brightly in the dark grey weather. He leaned back on the bench and straightened his legs. I looked to the side, away from him. I wanted to say so much, but I could barely get a word out. I wanted to ask about so many things, but nothing came out. I needed to say something now, before it was too late, there won't be any perfect time to talk about this. Things needed to be set straight.

"Alec..." I began. 

"Please, let's just enjoy this" I was surprised that he knew what I was thinking.

"I can't, not before I know everything will work out. Not until I know... something. Anything. Come on Alec, it feels like I'm with a stranger right now, I know nothing about you. I don't know what it's going to be like, how this relationship will continue if I don't know anything" I was getting frustrated, why couldn't he just say something.

"Okay, what do you want to know?" he sighed. His hands were buried in his pockets, I took mine out and placed it on his knee. 

"Anything. Everything. Just talk about yourself." I said. 

"Okay, well... There's nothing special about me."

"Bullshit" I murmured, he continued, hiding a slight smile.

"Well, to start things off, I have history. I guess we all do, and it's hard. To forget. I try hard to forget my past, it hasn't worked so far. I've done a lot bad shit when I was younger, and yeah I know I am already young, but I began in an early age. My dad died two years ago, Elijah probably already told you this, but he was a drinker, he drank a lot and he kinda passed it on to me. Whenever he drank he would offer me some alcohol, and I was young so I would always accept. Sometimes I was too afraid to say no. I remember the first time my dad came home drunk and offered me a bottle of mere beer, I didn't like the smell of it. It was my first time, I think I was four or five. When my mom found out she was pissed, she threw that exact bottle at my father, but he stumbled right before the bottle could hit him, instead it hit the back of my head." He took the hood off his head and bend his head down, he moved his hair out of the way so I could see a long scar in the back of his head. Fuck, that looked nasty. He lifted his head back up again, and I placed a hand behind his head. I scooted closer to him and placed both hands on each side of his head, my fingers tangled in his hair. I looked at him, with a frown. I wanted to take the pain away. But I couldn't, a lump formed in the back of my throat. I wanted to cry. It hurt me that he was hurting. 

"Help me understand, how I couldn't even face him the day of his death. I didn't visit him in the hospital. And help me understand, that if I had just one more day, to see him while still alive, I wouldn't tell him how I've missed him, I wouldn't care. I wouldn't hold him in my arms, I wouldn't thank him for being my father. I would blame him. Seems like yesterday when I saw his disgusting face..." his voice softened, "I sometimes think of him. I secretly hope he sees what I've become. That no matter how much he's put me though, I still managed to get back on track. Every bad thing that happened to me, was caused by him. He was the root to all my problems. And he didn't even live to see me fight through it." A single tear trickled down his cheek. I didn't move, I kept a straight face.

No words could describe how bad I felt. I have been through shit, I know what it's like, and I know there's no words that can make it all better. The words has to come from him, he has to get it all out, and I just have to be here for him. Nothing more nothing less. All we needed was each other. Right now, he needed me. I knew I didn't have to say anything, he just needed someone to listen to him.