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as i walked through the door of my quiet apartment, streaks of the pink and turquoise sunset shone through the skylight, leaving the kitchen countertops glistening.

i made my way to my room and plopped down on my messy-sheeted bed, leaving myself the blank ceiling to look at. i felt no emotion, yet i started to feel tears well up in my dry eyes. i couldn't stop thinking about the way i felt in that bathroom and on the car ride home. why did i allow that to happen to myself?
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i turned off the faucet and rubbed away the condensation on my bathroom mirror. i wrapped my damp hair in a towel and checked my phone.
13 min ago: (+1 386-717-2289) "u busy?" i waited for a minute to reply.
"couldn't stay away from me for two hours?" i answered, teasing him. i bit my lip and waiting for a response.
"guess not." i smiled and began typing when he sent a second text. "i mean, how could anyone stay away from you?" "hmm, not sure ;)" i sent him. "pick me up in 20?" i replied with my address and turned off my phone. half a second later, it vibrated. "sounds good, don't dress up." i let out a sigh of relief. i wasn't going to anyways.
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"here," ethan texted. i looked out my window to see the car i tried to help fix yesterday. it looked good as new, which it probably was.

i took one last look in my full-body mirror. i wore an oversized gray Champion t-shirt which was covered by a gold chain and my half-damp loose curls. i turned around to get a look at my butt. my light faded mom jeans made my ass pop. they were cut off at the bottom, leaving a few inches of skin to show between my jeans and old skool black and white vans with roses sewn along the sides of the stripes.

i quickly grabbed a black nike windbreaker from my closet and started for the door.

when i was outside my apartment building, i spotted ethan by his car, holding open the passenger door. my face flushed bright pink as i tried to hide my smile but failed.

i thanked him as i climbed in. when he reached the other side of the car and got in i asked where we were going. "you'll see," he said, leaving me curious. i glanced at his aux so i plugged in my phone and put my apple music playlist "edm" on shuffle. when electric love by bønes came on, he smiled and started singing off-key. i giggled, covering my face with my hands. i eventually started singing terribly with him until we were both laughing.

just before the song ended, we pulled into a vacant parking lot. i looked at him confused but followed him out of the car. he took my hand and looked at me. "cmon, i wanna show you something."

hand in hand, we walked over to a tunnel that id never noticed before. it was under the el, which i never took.

the concrete walls were graffitied with gang signs, names, and symbols. there were empty spray cans and cigarette packs everywhere.

after a few seconds of walking, there was an opening to our left. gripping my hand, he walked us out of the tunnel and into what looked like a different planet. it was a forrest type trail, lined with streams and trees. the whole setting itself was so aesthetically pleasing.

"i come here when i need to clear my head," he said, shielding his eyes from the sun creeping through the trees. "it's beautiful," i said, still in awe. it made me feel happy that ethan was comfortable enough to show me his 'place.' mine was an old abandoned building a few blocks from me.

"south side isn't all that bad," ethan said, looking around. he picked up an old sharpie a few feet from us and walked over to the concrete wall of the tunnel. there was a tiny open patch with no spray paint. "six, twenty two, seventeen," he said as he wrote the date. i walked over to him and grabbed the sharpie from his grasp. underneath ethan's handwriting, i wrote e + e but before he could say anything, his phone rang.

"yeah?" he said into his phone. instant muffled screaming came from the other line. "it wasn't-i- alright, alright! i'll be home in a minute," ethan groaned. he let out a sigh, put his phone back in his pocket and looked at me. "who was that?" i asked him, half-laughing, half-concerned. "it was my mom. apparently there's beer bottles everywhere and a broken coffee table!" he said with a sarcastic smile. "those fuckers."

he started walking away so i followed and asked, "do you want me to come with?" he stopped and turned around. "yeah, i want you to meet my mom."

wicked games // ethan cutkosky Where stories live. Discover now