Secret Love

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In the glamorous crowd of her party, she doesn't seem quite enjoying when the sole reason of this event is her. She is celebrating her birthday in the banquet hall in one of the prestigious hotel that her parents own. Most of the invited guests are somewhat stranger to her. She only has two real friends that keeps her sanity intact in this situation, but those two are missing in action. She picked up the glass of wine that the waiter been offering. As she put the mouth of the wine glass unto her lips she saw her best friend Momo walking towards on her direction, who is quite pissed and stomping her heels real hard. "I don't even know what to say to that Hoseok guy, he's really pissing my nerves off". One waiter who's offering a wine, came back on their direction. Momo snatched one glass, and drink the wine one shot.

"Okay, you really got my attention. What are you talking about?" Sana asked, who is now curious on what reason Momo feel so agitated. Hoseok is Momo's boyfriend. And if she said that Hoseok is a guy. He must have something done that really touch Momo's nerve.

Momo huffed a huge air out of her mouth to release her annoyance. Sana put down the wine glass on the near table and faces her friend who is still frustrated on the unknown situation. " Okay, spit it out." She asked her friend. "No...., it's my problem. And it is your birthday. You should be enjoying it, not deal with my so-called adventurous love life."Momo sip to the now empty glass and just realized it and put the wine glass down on the table. "Really? Momo? You just barging in my house every time in the night and disturb my sleep just to tell me how frustrated you are with Hoseok who is not your boyfriend before..and now that both of you are together, you don't want to tell me what happened?"

Momo gave a small sly smile to her friend and hug Sana's arm and lean her head on Sana's shoulders." It is nothing special. Really. It is just, he pissed me off when it is my time of the month where every little thing seems so aggravating to me. He just so overly hyper and I can't keep with up . You know how am I if I have my period don't you?" Sana remembered where she used to asked a lot of questions where she doesn't know that Momo has her ovaries issues and she just snapped out of the blue.

Sana left a small laughed until her eyes caught some familiar figure. Taehyung, who is laughing and seems like flirting with some girls in the corner of the banquet hall. He is the only guy friend that he has. And the only guy that she loves. He is the one who initiates the friendship between them. And she accepts it without thinking the consequences. She attempts to confess her feelings for so many times, but whenever she had the courage, Taehyung is already head over heels over someone who is not her.

Momo noticed how Sana's body stiffened. She faces her friend and asked, "What's wrong?" Momo look at on the direction where Sana's staring . Momo rolled her eyes on the situation. She is really so used to this. But seeing her friend in pain, torturing herself over this. She doesn't know if she wanted to slap Sana or give Taehyung an uppercut. Momo let a small groaned out of her frustration.

Sana's face masked of hurt and pain. She knew she doesn't have any right to feel this. She doesn't have any right to feel jealous. And she doesn't have any right to be hurt knowing the fact the guy that he love is not hers and will never be hers.

Momo look her friend again and hug her unknowingly. "I'm so sorry to say this, but I think it's time for you to let him go." She released Sana on the cage of her embraced and looks straight on her eyes. " You know I love you, second after Hoseok. But seeing you like this. Torturing and accepting all the pain that he involuntarily caused is not acceptable. Please, Sana, can you let him go?." Momo can see the pain through Sana's eyes. Sana let a huge amount of sighed and look at Momo. "I need air. I just need to go outside and cool down whatever it is going on my mind". Momo just nodded and Sana left her.

She went outside of the hotel's balcony to get some fresh air. She looks at the sky. The moon light's been peeking between the clouds but she can't see the stars cause of the city lights.

"There you are", she turned her head to where the familiar voice is. Taehyung looks so dashing with his black suit even with his messy hair; he can still pull off anything and still looks so good. He gave his one of his square smile. She returns his smile but it is so obvious that there's a trace of sadness on it.

"Is there something wrong? You should be enjoying and mingling with the people in your party." He touch her both cheeks and squished it.

"Why such a long face? Smile, it is your birthday". Sana removes his hand on her face and turn away to look at the city lights and cars below them. Taehyung follows her and stand beside her. "Is there something wrong?" he asked while staring at her side profile.

"I just...I just need to breathe". The wind blew so hard on their direction. She let an exasperated breath and pulls her hair out of her face. He put his both hand on her both arms and let her face him.

"I know there's something bothering you. Tell me" She looks at him straight on his eyes and all the pain that she keeps hiding finally submerge. She doesn't want to show the tears that's been welling up so she look away.

"Sana?" Taehyung sees the tears that are forming on her eyes. She inhales a huge amount of air and finally said.

"You" masked of confusion clearly shown on his face. "Me? Wha.....what are you talking about?". He kinda releases her hands on her arms. Sana runs her hands through her hair.

" You really don't know? Can you stop being so oblivious, just for once? Seems like everyone knows, the world knows, except..... YOU." Hurt resonate in her voice.

"I have feelings for you. I don't know when, how and why. But yes, you freaking heard me right. I have feelings for you. I fell in love with my best friend who is a jerk, insensitive, oblivious and numb. I fell for you so many times. Cause every time I fell I need to get up and help myself to heal the pain of the aftermath. But every time I feel alright and feel so okay. You just unknowingly pulls me towards you and I just let myself fell for you even more. Knowing you will never notice it. Knowing you will never catch me. I love you Taehyung. I love you and... it hurt me so much". Seems like the heavy thing that suffocates her lifted upon her chest, but like any other injured person, you feel the pain more than it should've been. She places her right hand on her forehead and sobbed so hard that she can't even breathe properly. Taehyung being shock upon the confession.

" I.... don't" he doesn't know what right words would be able to fit in this fogged situation. He wanted to hug her, wipe her tears, and take away all the pain he involuntarily caused.

Sana lifts her head and gasps some air. She faces Taehyung again. " Just to be clear. I didn't say all those things for you to love me back or look at me like I'm such a pathetic trash. I just need to let this out of my chest, caused it suffocates me. And I just need you to know that whatever we are now. The friendship that we had, will never been like before and will never been like in the future.

Sana saw Momo waiting for her beside the door of the banquet hall. She wipes her tears and left Taehyung dumbfounded.

He's trememdously shocked on what just happened. But there is one thing that he always holding back even when they first met. Taehyung knew to himself that he already fell in love with her the first time he laid his eyes on her. Unlike Sana who gets up so many times, just to fight what she truly feels. He fell for her and gives in and stays as where he is. But he's completely aware on how jerk he is. He hide his feelings from her, from anyone. Because he thought that he doesn't deserve someone so precious like her. He thought if he make it safely hidden somewhere in his heart, he may not be able to hurt her. But unknowingly, he still did.

And he decided to fight for what he truly feels. Maybe Sana gives up with their friendship, but he will make sure to that he will fight on her secret feelings towards him and his secret love towards her. And he will make sure that if she ever fall for him again, this time he will catch her and he will never let her go.

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