You Know Me

Prologue

I can't shake this feeling. It's like I'm being watched. Like every step I take, every move I make. It's never private.

This isn't the first time I've felt this feeling. It has always been this way, from the moment I was brought into this world.

It's not always so bad. Sometimes I feel comfort. like there's something, someone, knows I'm here.
Someone knows how I feel.

I have these dreams. They're so lucid, so real.

I'm in another persons body. I know because it doesn't feel like mine. But when I look in the mirror I see me.
Me with more kept up hair and no scars on my wrist, no bruises.

I'm in a nice, big house and I have clean clothes.

I'm not locked in a place disguised as a "home".

They try to make it feel normal but it never does. It never has and I need out.

The only thing keeping me even a little sane is painting. I can put how I feel on a canvas. I painted the walls of this place as well. But even that can't take away the miserable and haunting aura emitting from these walls.

But even painting doesn't always take me away completely. Nothing can, that's why I look forward to sleep every night.

It's the only thing that makes me forget. Sometimes I get night terrors or nightmares and I wish I could take them away.

There is no escape. I'm stuck here forever and death is my only possible escape.

But I don't want to die and that sliver of hope that was once a whole moon is all that is keeping me alive. When that's gone I don't know what I'll do next.

Meanwhile...

I wake from another nightmare.
I am in a place with colorful walls but the darkness of the room washes all the life out of them. It felt so evil and cold. I had hunger pains and cuts on my wrists and I was so skinny.

It felt so real as if I was there but I know it was just a dream.

My life has never felt complete even though I have everything anyone would want. A loving and functional family, a nice house, nice clothes. It's like a chunk of me was torn out at some point in my life.

Don't get me wrong. I am happy.
How could you not be when you've grown up with unconditional love like I have.

My parents can be annoying or aggravating sometimes but at the end of the day I know I love them both and it's all coming from a place of love.

But that doesn't change the fact that I've never felt complete no matter how much I've been given. I know it sounds selfish but it's true.

A/n Hey everyone!! So this was a prologue (obviously everyone can tell that already you dumb bitch) so this was just to give a little insight on the two pov's in the story. I'm not going to reveal much more in the upcoming chapters because I feel like I've already revealed alot of what I have planned for this book. I mean hopefully this is a good book, I don't really know if I'm good at writing or not. This is not professional and I suck at updating so don't expect alot from me, however I will do my best on this book because I feel like it has alot of potential.

Goodbye, lovelies ❤🌈