A lot of my life was dedicated to piecing myself together. From toxic relationships to losing so many to I thought I could love. Most of my life was a downfall of family. These are glimpses of what my life was like when it fell apart and was mending. Its crazy how I much my love life has contributed to my despair, but it was amazing at how much it made me mend.
A little bit about me, I'm a teenager, 5'1, I play in Bando. I play trumpet in my school's jazz band and French horn in symphonic. I'm also in an Open Class Drum Corp (which is like instense marching band). I'm in Heat Wave of Florida. I play mellophone. I find it interesting how band has also contributed to helping me better myself in my life in weird sort of funny ways. A lot of short stories are "coming to Jesus" moments in band or DCI that help me realize my life had meaning.
I have an okay family. Mostly supportive of me, growing up I was raised Catholic. My parents forced me into religion and for the longest time I hated myself because I was gay and I wasn't going to be accepted by something I couldn't see. About 6th grade, I began to go through puberty and my family began to deteriorate. My parents owned a resturant (authentic Salvadorian food). Due to the demands and what not, both my parents began to work consecutively. My other two siblings, who are both older (brother and sister), were never there. My brother already graduated from school and was in the work force (McDonald's of all places) and my sister was in high school. We owned that business for 3 years. Those three years were one hell of a struggle in my life. Having no one to talk to, no one to tell your life or feelings to, all in out it was hard. I had no way of controlling sadness which was caused by loneliness. Horrendous things took over me which I just couldn't handle. Love couldn't mend it. I still suffer from little things from my childhood. All in which is affect my life every some way.
God I hate talking about love. Mostly because it bites my ass when it wants to. Its disgusting how much LOVE can take my life and just..yeah. I've been cheated on s o many times, lied to s o many times, and left s o many times. A lot of times I find the right person but something ruins the happiness some way and I can never piece together why it affects me so much on how I post someone who could have been happy with me. Often times, its as simple as "I don't want to be with you" or as complicated as "I can't be with you". There's only one person in my life who has hurt me the most. Most of these "heart break" poems are from the time period of this person (whom I will refer to as "star" or "Miranda").
A lot of these are made up even if they say "Miranda" or "star" because I simply wanted to write it that way. I come to terms that I have a creative brain and I like writing.
These collections of writings have happened all through my life. I hope you enjoy and I hope I've helped anybody. I love you all and stay alive.
-Max
YOU ARE READING
The Taste of Sour
RandomJust poems and short stories that relate to my life over the years. Most were writen on paper and some were written on phones I've had over time. Others I just made up and I seemed to like them and I hope you do. Please, enjoy.
