Intertwined Souls (Matty Healy/George Daniel)

17: "Goodbye"

George isn't sure how long he's been staring down at his phone, but if he's going to make this call, it has to be now before it gets any later and Kyle heads to bed. This rush of courage won't last for long, and George is determined to take advantage of it before it fades away entirely.

But fuck - George is scared, and not of the end of his relationship, not anymore, but of confronting Kyle, because George isn't good at this, he never has been. Kyle always manages to distract him, to override him, to make him feel like shit even when he's done nothing wrong.

He can't let that happen this time though, he won't. He's going to stand firm in his decision, it's the right thing to do for everyone. He doesn't love Kyle anymore, hasn't for quite some time, so he has to tell him that instead of letting this farce go on for any longer.

And when George remembers how Matty's hand felt wrapped in his larger one, and how Matty had grinned up at him like he was the most important thing in the world before they said goodbye for the evening after returning to their block of flats, George finds the strength to press down on Kyle's name, his fingers only shaking slightly as he brings the device up to his ear slowly.

Kyle picks up during the third ring, which surprises George a bit, but he has been better about answering his phone lately. That's most likely only because of the fight they had before he left, he's usually kinder to George after one of their spats for a few weeks, but he always slips back into his old habits eventually.

"Hey love," Kyle answers, sounding slightly sleepy but also pleased, leaving George's stomach clenching nervously as he tries to decide how to start this unpleasant conversation that's been looming on the horizon for ages.

"Hi...um..." George stutters as he tugs at his hair, attempting to ground himself with the slight sting of pain that blossoms across his scalp, "are you busy right now, I mean - do you have time to talk?"

"Course, just got back to the hotel actually, I had dinner at this amazing restaurant tonight, I'm going to have to take you here one day, it was incredible," Kyle gushes, his sincere tone twisting itself into George's chest like a blunt knife, and he knows he has to speak now before he ends up recalling how good he and Kyle were together in the past, because they aren't now, no matter how complacent Kyle is acting at the moment.

"No," George snaps more harshly than he means to, a regretful sigh leaving his lips when Kyle grunts in an affronted manner, "sorry, I just...Kyle, this - us, I don't want to keep doing this, and I probably should have waited until you got home to tell you, but it's easier for me like this, and I just...I can't keep acting like I'm fine when I'm not," George stumbles over his words. He's aware that he's not making much sense, but it's a start at least.

"What the hell are you talking about George?" Kyle huffs, his kind nature from earlier evaporating as he realizes that something is amiss. "You're not drunk are you?"

"I'm not, I just have had a lot of time to think while you've been away," George mumbles slowly, doing his best to gather his wits and explain himself in a coherent manner, "and I don't miss you or anything, I'm almost happier when you're not here, and that's not right. I should want you with me all the time, but it's sort of the opposite actually, so I guess that I - I don't think I'm in love with you anymore."

George winces at his harsh words, but it's necessary when dealing with Kyle. He hasn't taken any of George's hints in the past, he's not attuned to subtleties, and it's probably better to rip this off like a plaster, to unload it all at once before Kyle takes the opportunity away from him.

"Fucking hell," Kyle curses hotly. George can hear him shifting around over the sound of his own ragged breathing, but he doesn't say anything else, getting that statement out was taxing enough. "I don't even know what to say to that, did John put you up to this? We were fine earlier, and I just don't understand where this is all coming from."