Its gone on for years now.
Falling into a pitiful mind
I hate myself for doing this
I knew one day I would fall short once more
I'd let the devil win.
Opening visions to the same exact place
The place I have come to fear the most
I'm brought back to life
Smelling of intoxication
Another memory made
This isn't what I had planned
I desired a solution to my restless soul
I needed a dry sponge to suck up the loneliness i felt.
I imagined my body limp
I imagined my body cold
A call for help was simply ignored
I remembered what I had done
The earth rich of superfluous people
Did it matter if they just lost one?
I could sense the time.
Here i wad completely vulnerable
They didn't know what was wrong with me
I never expected them to.
I didn't quite know what to feel considering that it was in fact possible
Ropes pulled
My air pipes tightened
My face plumply blue
The life I had turned grey
In a dark lonely room
Now let me slip your mind
For I am already in the abyss
They say I'm incurable
Like a plague slowly killing
There was no hope left
Was all this still even worth living?
I will close my eyes now
I have done this before.
Remember my words I spoke when you see me pale as a vampire
My mind was never easy so now I must go.
And I will die in peace
I will fly away like a bird.
Trust me old souls, I'm doing this for the best.
Planning this moment for years now
I want to be free
Free of my own mind
For I was only waging wars
I cried myself to sleep each and every night.
I didn't sleep
I never ate
I couldn't look in the mirror
I couldn't live with the scars or the carved words in my skin
I'm over and done with
Let it all sink in
This life is beautiful
Its something I might miss
But I'd rather be in heaven
Not having to worry about what my mind would tell me today.
Isolation pleased me
Gently, perfectly, one by one
Each mistake accounted for.
Goodbye to my loved ones,
I am an incurable soul.
