Ok I'm writing to you today because this year is going to be different. I turn 18 on New Years and this year I'm going to change who I am.I have never met you before but I was told I could talk to you about anything,at least that's what he told me. So I hope you care because I need someone to talk to. I just don't want you to meet me because I have never seen you and I'm not quite sure who you are.
To tell you somethings about me, my name is Melanie. Me and my family are moving across the country. But I can't tell you where because I don't want you to know, but I still want to talk to you. We're moving here because of my "problem". My parents say I have depression and so do the doctors,and the counselors,and everyone else they make me meet,but I feel like there hiding something else from me . I'm not sad or depressed even though they say I am. Sometimes I just need space. But that's ok right? That's what I'm writing to you. I wear dark clothes and makeup because I like the color black. Not because I'm Emo or anything. I don't tell them this but sometimes I loose track of what I'm doing and have blank periods where I don't remember anything.
Anyways at my old school I was always messed with and called names for being different. They would call me weird and the emo bitch. For some reason they called me a slut but I'm not sure why. I'm a virgin I've only ever had one serious relationship and well it ended very badly.
I am on Christmas break right now. So when the new semester starts I will be going to a new school for the rest of my senior year.
In November I was at the hospital doing my weekly checkups when someone from my school saw me. The next day at school everyone knew. I was getting yelled at and pushed and called horrible names when someone finally told the principal,who told my parents. The next week I left school along with my big brother Josh he's almost a year older than me but we started school the same year. He always looks out for me so I wouldn't be surprised if he's the one who told the principal.
Right now we are in the car leaving the town we grew up in with all our belongings with us. I watch out my window as we pass my old elementary school. It was the the same as i remembered except I had snow covering the top. I see the big green forest covered in white as I remember the memories in it...
"Josh come here"cries my 8 year old self. Josh comes running but he can't find me.
"Mel,where are you" he asks jokingly once he realizes I'm messing with him. He looks around,then to the trees. I see him glance up to the tree where I'm at. He looks at the ground and smiles pretending not to see me.
"Hmmmm where could she be" he said as he starts to look at wholes in the trees or under a stick. I start cracking up. Then I hear my 12 year old sister Ann say
"You two better get your butts back in this house mom says it's time for dinner". We holler ok and josh helps me down. I run up to Ann and give her a huge hug and yell
"Hey sissy!!" She hugs me back and says
"Moms making your favorite,fish and mac and cheese" I take off running to the house yelling about mac and cheese
"Wait for me and josh"she yells. I stop and turn to face them. They start walking towards me when I look at Ann and think of how much she looks like our mom they both have long blonde locks and blue eyes that sparkle like the sea. Josh looks more like dad with brown hair but the same blue eyes. Me and Josh could be twins we looks almost identical.
They run to catch up. When they meet up with me Ann reaches out her hand and I take it. We walk back to the house across the road hand in hand.
I come back to reality and remember how there's no more Ann. I turn my head to face the window,and feel hot tears run down my face. No I think to myself I can't cry now no matter how much it hurts. I wipe my eyes with my sleeve. I look over at josh who sits in the backseat. I feel a surge of affection for him. He sees me watching him and gives me a smile. No matter how mad I get at him he's always nice to me. He's grown up so much since our days when we played in the forest.
I lean back and relax in my seat,then put in my earbuds and listen to my favorite band Shinedown. I get teased by the music I listen to by Josh. But I don't care my musics is best.
After a few hours I take out my earbuds and look out the window it looks like we're in a big city. I see several skyscrapers but ones taller then the rest with huge windows and red bricks. There are several highways including the one we're driving on. It's nothing like it was back home. We lived in the country with only a few house next to us and a forest not far from our house. Before I left our class had 15 in the graduating class. I wonder how many I'll have now. I sigh I hat that we have to move. All because some stupid kid blabbed his mouth. That was the one thing I didn't like about living in a small town. News traveled faster than light.
We drive a little longer when we pull onto a smaller road leading to several nice houses when my mom says
"Here we are"
