PART ONE - February Blog Post

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Nobody loves me.

Tried to kill myself in the past because I knew this would happen. Something's wrong. It's too late to prevent something now. There's nothing I can do.

I wonder if this is what insanity feels like? But insane people don't know they're insane, right? So I can't be. Just frustrated and depressed, I guess.

I hate not knowing what to do anymore and Mom won't let me call the police. Says my problem's not for them. What the hell is going to happen to me.

Plan a stabbing spree? And it feels so strange to say it so calmly. There've been lots of school-shootings. Am I going to be stabber?

I know I'll just suffer until I die. I'm not okay. Too far gone. All I want is to kill now. I'd love a gun because it'd be so easy, but I'll have to make do with knives. Maybe then the police will shoot and kill me at the school.

That would be nice.

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