His Intense Love

6

Rick

I kept thinking about all days, imagining it is real, imagining she is still in love with me, and all the while the pain carried on building until my screaming temples, and the burning fire coursing through my nervous system, telling me this is nothing but a fat lie. The sting of her words surely last long than a slap. I remember her each word, those words cut me deeper than a knife. The crude reality hit me, she doesn't love me anymore, she said my touch repulse her, did she really mean that? Frustration, sense of despair, and utter anguish that is so deep and acute that it almost surpassed me. And then I saw black before my eyes, I started breaking everything down into pieces of my cabin until I exhausted, and I flopped onto my chair.

Now, our memories play in slow motion and my stomach wretches as the pain swarms my heart, she forced me to feel this estrange feelings, she taught me to love, she brought the happiness in my life and now she is the reason of my despair. Why she is solely blaming me for everything? When will she realize that her father was the one to blame? That bastard has ruined my life, even his death worked against me, it took my Jen from me. Why can't she see I need her? Why can't she feel my love? I shoved the file aside roughly, angry and frustrated with everything. This love is not for your Rick, you were doing better without this, it has only offered you a pain. I start to feel dizzy, I grip the table leaning onto the chair, I need an escape from this agony. I closed my eyes, and I saw Jen's face contorted with much hate.

I heard a loud knock on my door, it infuriated me further.

"Come in" I growled in agitation.

I turned my chair on the direction of the voice, the timid looking Jenny is standing before me holding a file. She reminds me so much of my Jen, she has same features, I was drifted away in my thought but Jenny interrupted me again.

"Huh?" I asked her blankly, her eyes seems to understand my tremor, it offended me further. She wanted to leave but I rudely asked the file on which she needs my signature. While signing she saw my wounded hand , she reacted girly like, it annoyed me. I singed the file and asked her to go but she didn't buzz, instead of leaving she went to my restroom. This stupid girl, I'm already on the edge of losing my head and she is awaking my beast but instead of following her, I waited outside burning in the rage.

When she came out, I stop her blocking her way, she squirmed.

"What the hell do you think you are?" I asked gritting my teeth.

"You should clean your wound before it infect" her words took me to my old memory lane, Jen and I were caught in the same situation, she said those damn exact words. I still remember her concerned eyes, her gentle touch, her innocent love for me and our moment. Even in our darkest phase of life, we found our a little moment, in that moment she was mine and I was her's. It tucks my heart, I want those moment back, I want my Jen back. I'm on the verge of breaking, I want to cry like a river, and I don't want anybody to witness it.

"Let's clean your wound" she gave me a soft smile, I want this affection and this encouraging smile but not from you Jenny... just go away.

"I don't need it, get out from here" She should leave before I do any damage to her, I know she is being genuinely sweet to me but I don't want her pity. Why can't she understand?

"Not before I bandage your hand" she said in a challenging tone, stubborn stupid girl, fine, I have warned her, I jumped on her.

"I warned you, I warned you before" I grabbed her arms harshly, I was gone mad with my rage. I wanted to teach her lesson, so she will stop being nosy. I was about to do something worse when I heard a gasp, I turned my head to see my intriguer and I got gobsmacked at my place watching shocked Jen. Immediately I freed Jenny from my grip, she caught me in the middle of indecent situation. Another reason to hate me added in her list. But why the hell she is here? Isn't she done with her hurtful words?