Fix You | Cyan

Damage | Chapter 14

The car ride was completely silent. Neither of us even tired to speak a word to each other. I think he was just to anger to pay me any mind at the moment and I was to scared that if I spoke to him he would just end up getting even more angry with me.

As he pulled into the driveway and killed the engine neither of us moved to get out of the car. He kept his gaze straight ahead and I didn't want to get out without him doing so. I was scared that one wrong move he wouldn't want me around tonight and I couldn't let that happen. I just wanted to get this over with so I had a chance of having my Daddy back for the night. I didn't like how he was acting right now.

"Ryan." He said my name, pausing as if he was waiting to have my full attention. I jumped a bit at my name, scared what he would say after it. "Go inside and wait for me in the living room. The front door is unlocked. Don't make this anymore difficult then it needs to be."

I nodded my head slowly as I open the car door and stepped out. I walked up the driveway slowly, listening for the sound of the driver side door shutting and him following me up the driveway but it never came. I didn't know how to feel about that and this wasn't making any sense to me but I stayed silent. He wasn't looking for me to question him on this, I knew this him even telling me so. I think he was testing how well I would listen to him. 

Going into the house by myself felt strange to me but I wanted to put it past me so I could just get this over with. I walked into the living room and sat down on the couch, curling my legs up and wrapping my arms around them. I rested my chin on the top of my knees as I starred at the wall, just listening to hear him come in.

I wanted to run and hide, I didn't want to go through with this. I knew that hiding from him would just make things worse though.  I already knew that at times Daddy could have a short temper and I didn't want to see it at it's full force. Ricky had warned me about this once beofre and told me he hoped I would never be exposed to it. Hopefully me sitting here like a good boy will make him go easy on me. 

Not to long after I had that thought I heard the front door slam shut and I jumped, shaking more then I was before. I could hear him basically stomping over to where I was and I didn't even turn around when I felt him coming up behind me. All of this just seemed to be bringing back too many memories for me to handle with.

Daddy sat down on the couch next to me and didn't say a word. He put a hand under my arm and dragged me over his lap. My face was buried in the couch cushion and my ass was elevated over his legs.

I started to squirm around, trying to look back at him but he grip the back of my head and pushed it back down into the couch. "Don't move." I heard him take a deep breath as he paused and he seemed to be trying to calm himself. "Just stay still for me." 

I let out a small whimper as I shook with fear. I don't think Daddy really was noticing that I was doing this, he seemed to be more caught up in his own rage to pay any mind to me. I wish he would notice right now. I was too scared right now to even try to tell him that. Plus I don't really think he would of listened to me.

He ripped my pants down to around my ankles, leaving me bare before him. "You dirty fucking boy. What was getting one cock up your ass tonight not enough for you? Did you think wearing nothing underneath your clothes would make me want to fuck you to?"

I shook my head quickly, I didn't want him right now, not like this.. Right about now I just wanted him to let me go, I didn't want him to touch me in anyway when he was like this. He was scaring me right now. 

I felt his hand come down on me without warning and I let out a gasp. I brought my hand up to my face, muffling my noise. I didn't know if the sounds would just anger him more. Back when TJ would get mad at me he would get more upset when I made a sound without his say so. Daddy was reminding me a lot of him right now. I didn't need to relive the mess I had with my ex, he was supposed to be different.

Wack "You are" Wack  "just a good" " Wack "for nothing" Wack. "whore." Wack. Each word came out as a growl and I let out a shocked gasp. He had never spoken to me in this way before. I never want him to, not in a moment like this. 

He gave me one more rough slap and it seemed he was making sure this one was the hardest hit. He grab me by my hair and started to pull me so I was sitting up, facing him. "I should of never trusted such a fucking slut." 

I felt my eyes start to well up with tears and I started shaking harder. I didn't mean to mess up this badly. I didn't expect him to react this way with me. 

Daddy hadn't really gotten a good look at me until he had me on his lap and all the anger faded from his face. He seemed in shock by his own actions. It was like he had gone into a different world mentally well he was punishing me. It made sense though, none of this seemed like him. It didn't make me feel any better about any of this though.

"Oh my god baby I'm so sorry. I didn't think- I didn't realize what I was doing. I-I don't even know what happened." He stammered out as he was trying to put the pieces together. 

At this point tears were streaming down my face and I was shaking uncontrollably. I don't think there was anything he could say right now that could make this better. I was hurt so badly by him and I lost some level of trust that I had given him. 

I stood up as I pushed his arms off of me. He tried pulling me closer but I fought against him even harder when he did that. I didn't say a word once I was away from him, I just rushed up the stairs wanting to be as far away from him as I possibly could.