Philophobia

TWENTY-NINTH I

AssalamoAlaikum,

How life is, lovelies? 

THIS UPDATE TOOK AGES I KNOW AND COMPENSATION STRATEGY SAYS TO GIVE DOUBLE UPDATES THIS WEEK. Fine?

The story has three to four chapters remaining now and I feel awful these days. 

Nevertheless, I will update another in this week, if Allah wills, and then will take a sound break for exams. 

Thank you so much for all your votes and comments. I feel so bad when I do not update but receive bunches of them. 

Take care. 

Until next update,

Allah Hafiz.

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If there had been any days without her in his life, he was living!

If there had been any morning without her sleepy smile and struggle to hide her face in the crook of his neck, faint beams of that dawn were bathing him.

If there had been any father of an unborn child mourning over his life and suppressing the bud of immense pleasure deliberately, he was the one.

If there had been any moment when her eyes did not see his shivering eyelashes as the first thing after his sleep, the needles had ticked.

She was gaining consciousness. Blurred images, confused yellow stripes on carpeted road, the realization of a man with two women lowered on her face, a loud collision and she had opened her eyes; fear of being left all alone without him was evident on her face. Exhaustively dropping those red heavy eyelids again she hummed meaningless nothings and doctors rushed to pacify her drowsy state.

...

Your diamonds left my neck,

Your melodies discarded my words.

Your arms abandoned my shoulders,

Your coffee purged vanilla.

And I hated white.

And I hated,

Words,

Fake gloss,

Rains,

Twilight,

Moonlight,

Poppies,

And myself.

For no reason!

For no reason!

For no reason!

...

"Foolish heart does not know how to stop loving you." He released a frustrated chuckle and his eyes wandered around her feeble physique. The pinkness under her skin had been replaced by the yellow of sad, mustard of grief and blue of panic.

"The world may say that you are at peace now, Sataish, but ask me. All that I can see is pain, restlessness and ache." Torturing his lips he thought. The doctors had informed him about her condition and he had started to fear the moment where he was to appear before her; where her eyes would scan his face and he would yearn to dive deeper in the well of shame, not looking back, no new days, and no future plans.

But there was something that he had to do. He had to risk his decisions for the painful and troublesome days she was starting to go through. He had embraced this fact the very moment when doctor told him that he was soon going to get a piece of his heart in his arms. He was afraid. He had been afraid through his life but the fear on the other side was more evident without been discussed. He never talked to her since the news reached his ears but he knew that his fragile wife badly needed him in this phase of their lives; happily or sadly, pretentiously or wholeheartedly.