melissa.
I love the sea. The waves crash against the rocks as I stroll along the shore. The evening sun has just set over the horizon casting an orange hue over the sky. I look over the distant. The waters reflect the fiery sky and a few pelicans fly overhead. 'What a beautiful evening'. My bare feet leave prints on the wet sand. A gentle breeze blows over my hair as the soft dying sunlight kiss my face. There is no one on the beach. I can't help but relish the solitude. Just then a voice in my head whispers 'But you're alone'.
Suddenly my peace of mind is replaced by a strong feeling of longing. A craving rather. For no matter how beautiful the moment, I know you would only have made it better. You.
The evening swiftly fades to dusk. The waves seem to have died and the sea is quiet. The glow of final rays of the setting sun makes everything look so picturesque. The rocks, the sand, the waters. Mesmerising yet poignant.
'If only you were here.'
I sigh and turn back.
joshua
I don't think I know her anymore.
4:12 pm
The strong smell of antiseptic fills the small room. I had accidently cut my finger while trying to sharpen my pencil. The pencil with which I draw. I draw sometimes. Portraits, landscapes, still life, almost everything. My perception and my imagination. I can't say that I am very good at it but I like it. I like it when I hold the pencil or brush sometimes and I have control over everything. I can do what I want with on the blank paper.
However right now there are red blotches of blood on the sheet and I bite my lips to ease the stinging pain of the antiseptic. Right now I don't have control over anything. Much like my own life.
4:26 pm
I wonder if when will she come back. I know she will but just when is a question I am not so sure about.
4:31 pm
Lying on the floor of our small apartment, I stare blankly at the ceiling. White washed. A single cream coloured fan that is switched off.
Through the window I can see the sunset and a few birds flying overhead. Beside that window, on the cupboard is my favourate portrait. Of her. Her soft curls, her kind eyes, her curved lips; my love in blank ink. She had loved it then. I am not so sure of now.
4:37 pm
I continue to stare at the ceiling. Or at nothing rather. Thoughts drift in and out of my mind. I push some away while I let others linger for little longer.
Yet I realise that even in this weird boring situation I miss her.
We could just stare at the ceiling and conjure up stories and things would appear a bit different. Magical perhaps. To have her lay beside me, to hear her breathe and the sultry smell of her hair that reminds me of summer afternoons would be enough to calm my anxious heart and ease my troubled mind.
Lately though, I am not sure if I know her anymore.
But I know that I love her still the same.
m.
The evening sun has set. I walk fast back to my house. Or rather back to our apartment. Not home. I can't really call it our 'home', can I? It is just two small rooms and that is not even a reason why I don't like it. We could like in a single room cottage and I would happily call it our 'home sweet home'. However I don't get those homely vibes. The apartment makes me feel like we are two young lovers in a sad novel. Broke, tired and trying. To make ends meet. To make a living. To just live. It is hard when love is the only comfort in a mundane existence; and I am not even sure of it anymore.
Night has crept in and the early stars look like diamond dust sprinkled across the velvet sky. The waves rise and fall and the sea seem to be serenading a song for the night minstrel . It is hauntingly beautiful. Yet I feel a strange emptiness. Of such magnitude that even the vast open sea can't seem to fill it.
