Not Perfect (Harry Styles fanfiction)

;It started with a joke

okay so this is the legth of a normal one shot but will actually be in like five or six 'chapters' its not going to be very long but yeah... im really just using it as a place to ge out a lot of bad feelings.....hope you enjoy. remember im always her to listen.

The first time Harry'd been told he was overweight he thought nothing of it. It was a joke at first. The boys constantly pointing out how he was pudgy and needed to hit gym. But Harry had always been a bit self conscience and wasn't sure whether they were telling the truth, so Harry did what he normally did when receiving hate, he checked twitter. His mentions had blown up, reassuring his current problem. There were tweets everywhere people conforming what he already knew. "Have you seen how much weight @Harry_Styles has put on?" "i think @Harry_Styles needs to lay off the sweets" and other stuff rubbing in how beautiful the other boys are compared to him.... "All the boys used to be so fit, @Harry_Styles what happened?" And that's all it took for him to shut down. He knew they were right. They were fans and they only wanted what was best for him right? They would never lie to him or mislead him right? And the boys they were practically brothers they had no reason to lie. It was true Harry styles needed to lose weight and he needed to do it fast....

What Was Harry Doing?

okay so heres another small part, when its all finished i think i might put it all on one slide or 'chapter'. what do you think?

anyway enjoy!

When it started not much changed except he was constantly checking himself in the mirror, becoming almost as obsessive as Zayn was. The first time he purged, he didn't think it'd be a reoccurring thing. He had tried to diet and it just wasn't working so he had to try something else. He hated it so much but he needed this, he couldn't stay that person he was that fat, disgusting man he used to be, still was really. He needed to carry on, needed to improve needed to be perfect. He was letting the whole band down. However the harsh gagging and quick relief he felt after the contents of his stomach had been released into the bowl left an amazing feeling deep within him. It hurt, but he felt so in control for the first time in a very long time, he was in control and doing something just for him not for the fans or the boys or management at that moment he knew this was just the beginning. It would become his little secret. His escape. All he wanted was to be as thin as any of the other boys. To he perfect like then so the fans loved him as much as the others, make the fans proud. He would soon lose sight of what was happening and why, it became compulsive. He could feel himself be coming addicted but he couldn't stop now. He was so close to his goal weight.

Is It Working?

He didn't know what hurt more; the constant hunger he felt after he lost his meal or the fact that the boys still continued to joke about it. They hadn't even noticed. I mean Harry didn't want them to know why he was losing weight (or how much) they would only make him stop. Which at this point Harry was not willing to give up, not yet, not ever. however, it would have been nice if they'd have noticed he'd lost a ton of weight and he had hoped they'd stop teasing him by now. Weeks went by and Harry was quickly dropping weight. He smiled to himself as he went down size after size. Got a thrill everytime he had to get new jeans. He was proud of all he was doing. He'd got to about 110 pounds which was amazing in his opinion it was just above the goal he had set. He felt good proud of who he'd become but when he looked in a mirror he still didn't look as skinny as he wanted. All he saw was fat. Harry had started to feel really light heated and faint when ever he stood up, he could feel the effects of not eating taking there toll on him, his body hanging up against him but he still wasn't good enough, he was not yet perfect, the boys hadn't even noticed yet so he couldn't have lost that much weight. So he continued to eat as little as possible and to purge anything he did eat. He began working out for five to six hours a day to make sure he looked his best. Tour was starting again in a few weeks and rehearsals were well on the wat. So he knew he'd have to be ready by then, hrs knew how hard it would be to purge on the bus without the boys noticing but at this point hw didn't have a choice. He had to be perfect by tour so the fans wouldn't be disappointed

The boys Find Out

Unfortunately for Harry, all good things had to come to an end. They knew that Harry never did like to be confronted but they kept an eye on him without making it to obvious, but Harry saw the way they looked at him.

He could tell that the boys were becoming suspicious of Harry's rapid weight loss. Much to harry displeasure they were constantly checking to make sure he'd been eating. Harry was finding it hard to find time to purge with one of the boys constantly hanging around. However Harry was never one to displease all hrs ever wanted was everyone to be proud of him and room be happy with what and who he was.

He'd make a show of inviting the boys out to dinner, eating the meal with them, making sure he ate every last thing but as soon as the boys left him along he'd be back up in the toilet with a finger curling down his throat.

Tonight had been different. After the meal all the boys had a date (harry had a date with the toilet),when he thought they were gone he'd got back on the bus and headed towards the toilet. However, Louis had forgotten his keys to his car in the diner so he walked back on to the bus where Harry was wondering if Harry had picked them up.

He saw his keys on the table, silently thanking harry, who he assumed was in his bunk sleeping (we had all been worried about him but he said he hadn't been feeling well lately that was probably why he was losing so much weight) Louis grabbed his keys and started off towards the door until he heard the sound of gagging from the toilet."Haz?" he called out, slowly making his way towards the toilet, if Harry had been that ill why hadn't he said. "H? Hazza? you okay?"

When he pushed open the door he hadn't expected to find Harry with his hand down his throat. It took him a moment but soon he was pulling Harry away from the toilet, wrapping him up in his arms. Harry was spitting off apologies, and Louis was quick to reassure him that he was alright. He ran his hands through Harry's curls, not stopping even when Harry's breath even out. Louis sucked in a shaky breath. How had he not noticed what Harry had been doing? None of them had. None of them had seen what there youngest bad member had been doing. They needed to stop this. Harry had to get better. He just had to.

Lputs sat there withhim. for ages just whispering sweet nothing into his curls. wondering why harry would ever think his was needed. harry was is and will always he perfect Louis was in love with him, not that he'd ever say that to harry. just incase he didnt feel the same. Right now harry needed him.