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New York, September 2005
"Hey upper east siders, gossip girl here, its been 3 days since our favorite It girl went MIA. Of course Queen B is devastated and since the horrible day our fav blondie has been away she was only spotted with girls from the royalty of the next generation, V and E.
Btw keep an eye on these girls, cause i've heard a lot of things about them and my sources say they are here to stay. Wait for more details. you know you love me, xoxo, gossip girl."
All three girls finish reading the blast from their not-so-favorite blog which, in Emilie's words, is invasive and cruel, and the two young girls stare melancholically into Blair's expression which clearly expressed nothing but pain. Emilie's heart broke to see her "sister" like this knowing there was absolutely nothing she could do about it. If it were about anything else she would immediately suggest retail therapy which she was always a fan since she was in diapers, she grew up with the phrase "Shopping is cheaper than a therapist and twice as effective" which is partly true since her retail therapy involved basically three brand new Chanel bags and two Jimmy Choos which isn't actually cheaper than a therapist but that was her life motto, and she stuck to it. But retail therapy wasn't going to be enough to mend Queen B's broken heart, she needed her best friend, the one and only who truly understood her.
Even though powerless usually isn't in the vocabulary of these kids, no other word would describe how Blair was feeling.
After 10 minutes silent, someone finally tried to say something, not that it would actually help, but she could at least try.
"You can't stay like this forever, Serena was a bitch to you, that's a fact, she left you when you most needed her. But the queen of the Upper East Side doesn't put her head down for any, fucking, thing. You're Blair Waldorf, you can't forget that, now get your ass out of this bed and let's go to Ladurée and fill our faces with macarrons and hot chocolate." said, suprisingly, Emilie.
Blair was shocked because she knew every single harsh word coming out of that little girl's mouth was true and that she couldn't be sitting there crying over Serena, she had a city to rule and no one could change that. But she nodded affirmatively and the three girls rushed down the staircase and left her apartment to go get something sugary to eat because if shopping can't mend a broken heart, overpriced food certainly can.
Even though Emilie sounded like she hated Serena to her guts, that was a lie, the blonde meant the world to her and more importantly, she was Blair's world and Blair was her world, and seeing her like that was heartbreaking and she knew she had to do something about it.
Violet was surprisingly quiet during this whole time. She was heartbroken because her cousin left without even telling her. She knew that Serena was okay, since as soon as she arrived on the boarding school she called Eric to tell Violet and Lily that she was safe and sound. But she asked Eric to keep her location a secret at least for a while to everyone else, even Blair.
This secret was killing Violet because she tells Emilie everything, and not telling her knowing that this secret would relief her and Blair was destroying her inside, but if Serena wanted it a secret she must have her reasons and even though she didn't agree, she had to respect it.
Arriving at the restaurant their moods were instantly a bit better since that was one of the few times they had left the apartment in days. As soon as they were seated, Blair pulled her phone and called Lily, hoping she knew something about Serena.
"Hey, it's B. I just wanted to ask you one last time if Serena has told you anything or even tried to contact you because I'm worried sick about her and there is absolutely nothing I can do to find her."
"Hi Blair sweetie, yes, Serena called right before you and she asked me to tell you that she is in a boarding school in Connecticut and there is no way you can contact her. This was as unexpected for me as it is being to you but there's nothing we can do."
"Oh, well thank you Mrs Van der Woodsen. I have to hang up now since my food has arrived but well, goodbye and thank you." The brunette could feel her heart shattering into many pieces and she just wanted to cry, or throw up whatever came first.
"Any news?" Violet asked trying to break the tension.
"Yes, she is in a boarding school in Connecticut, there is no date for her to return, Lily knows as much as we do right now so" as her voice faded she coughed and said "she also told me not to try to contact her because we will fail."
"I'm literally shocked, I couldn't expect something like this just what the fuck" Emilie bursted out.
"This is low, even for Serena" Violet added.
"Well ladies, there's nothing we can do about it now, let's move on with our lives until she has some sense and decides to come back."
♛
Connecticut, September 2006
"Dear B,
It's your favorite girl here or at least the girl who was your favorite one. I wanted to say sorry, for abandoning you without further notice, even though nothing can justify why I did this, I can try to.
I needed a break, I needed a break more than anything, with Eric on the Ostroff Center and mom saying he is with Aunt Carol in Miami. I was also going through many problems with Lily, we would fight everyday, she would drink more than she already does, she would shop excessively (yes even for a upper east sider), things weren't going well.
So I didn't know what to do, my grades were dropping, my skin was breaking and I had stomach pain, I knew I had to do something about it, so I did. I googled boarding schools who had a connection with Constance and I found this one in Connecticut where I could be transfered for a few months and then come back. I immediately applied and booked an interview and as soon as I got there I didn't want to come back, not that the school was great or anything it's just that I felt such peace of being away from this chaotic island.
I wanted to call you but I didn't have the courage to do it, I knew I was wrong, I should've told you and you would've helped me, I should've relied on my best friend, but i failed even doing so. So I hope one day you can forgive me, and don't ever think I forgot you, because you will always be in my heart,
With nothing but love and sorrows,
Serena."
Gasping, Serena glanced at the letter and asked herself why she had written that. She knew Blair, and she knew that that girl was proud as fuck and that there was nothing she could do to minimize what she had done, she knew she had fucked up, badly.
After a few minutes of reflexion she decided that this letter would do nothing but piss Blair off, even more, so she threw it away, among with her hopes of getting her best friend back, and decided to move on with her life, or at least try. But what Serena didn't know is that an It Girl just doesn't disappear out of the blue.
♛
A/N: hello! so this is finally the first chapter that I took way too long to post! I promise the next one won't take so long but anyways, hope you enjoyed it!!
