Chapter 3: I'm Coming Home

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*Camila's P.O.V*

Today's the day Lauren comes home.  To be honest I'm more than nervous.  I'm afraid I can't do for her what she needs.  I'm afraid I can't keep her from relapsing.  I'm afraid I can't convince her that her life means something.  I hope she at least knows I love her more than anything.

I wanted to come to the hospital with Mr. Foxxe to pick her up but he said that he thought it'd be better to get as much rest as possible before she gets home just in case I'll need to stay up with her over night.  He doesn't know we're together but he knows we're best friends.  He just kind of assumed I'd be the one taking care of her.

We're only in the hotel for one more night before we're on the road again.  I honestly don't think that's the best for Lauren but it's not like I can argue.  We told the fans we were all battling a nasty cold and what we just needed to take a few weeks off.  Once it was leaked that Lauren was in the hospital we told the fans it was because she was had caught pneumonia but will be back on her feet before we knew it.

I paced back and forth waiting for my beautiful girlfriend to step through the door of our shared hotel room.  I ran my hand over her side of the bed lightly.  I've been sleeping alone in this cold, dank room since she was admitted to the hospital.  The girls always offered to sleep with me but I always refused so they would take turns sleeping on my couch to watch me carefully, making sure I don't slowly go insane.

Suddenly there was a small knock and Mr. Foxxe peered around the door.  "Hey," his low voice boomed.  "We're back."  He opened the door a little more letting a very small, fragile, sickly looking Lauren walk through the door.  "Do you need anything else?" Mr. Foxxe asked, still at the door.

Lauren and I both shook our head in silence, never breaking eye contact from one another.  "Alright, well if you need anything you know where my room is.  I'm going to go tell the girls Lauren's back.  They'll probably be by then I recommend you getting some rest, long day on the bus tomorrow." Mr. Foxxe concluded before ducking out of the room.

I walk over to Lauren and took her waist in my hands.  I pulled her tightly into my chest and held the small of her back delicately.  It took her a moment to react but eventually she did.  She slid her arms around my neck and buried her nose into my neck.  Her hot, moist breath tingled my skin and goose bumps danced across my body.  "I missed you so much." I whispered, kissing her temple.  "Please don't ever do that again.  I can't bare to lose you."

I feel her shudder and the wetness of tears fall into my collarbones.  I hold her tighter and we stand in silence. Finally she too a deep breath and spoke, "I missed you too, Camila.  I'm so sorry."

She sounded as if she was going to say something else but the girls burst into the room interupting her.  "Lauren!" Dinah screamed.

They all ran towards her but I spun her behind my back and stepped protectively in front of her.  "Girls, five steps back then we need to talk." I groweled.  They obeyed.  I left Lauren behind me and I walked over to the girls.  "Guys, Lauren is still very fragile.  Touch her as if she may break like fragile glass.  Also, because what you say to her, she's kind of still touchy, she'll still barely talk to me, please just give her time to become her old self again, and until then please be careful with her." I hissed at them trying to sound genuine.  

They nodded in agreement and turned back to her.  "I'm glad you're back." Dinah said in a low voice, hugging her gently.

"I missed you Lauren.  We all missed you." Ally murmered gestering towards all the girls and patting Lauren on the shoulder.

Normani nodded, taking Lauren's hand and rubbing it, comfortingly, "It's good to see you back, Lauren, don't forget we all love you.  I love you." she said quietly.

Lauren just nodded and sadly smiled at the girls.  I wrapped my arms around her from behind, resting my chin on her shoulder.  I kissed her cheek.

Dinah looked at us with a sympathetic look, "We should all get some rest, big day tomorrow."  Normani and Ally looked at us then nodded at Dinah in understanding.  They all said good night then disappeared out our door and down the hotel hall.

I spun around to face Lauren, my arms never leaving her waist.  I look deeply into her eyes.  She tries to void eye contact but I finally catch her eye, looking ours together.  Her beautiful green eyes are riddled with fear, sadness, and so many other emotions.  I brush some hair out of her face and wipe a tear that has fallen from her eye.

"Can I kiss you?" I asked in a whisper.  She nodded slowly and her eyes fluttered closed.  I leaned in and softly placed my lips on hers.  Lauren wraped her arms around my neck and deepened the kiss.  I was about to slide my tongue across her lower lip when she broke the kiss by a sob errupting from her mouth.  I pulled her into my chest and just let her cry.  I knew now wasn't the time to ask questions, I held her tightly allowing her to feel safe as she freely let tears fall from her eyes.  Once I heard her breathing settle down, I pulled away from the hug.  "Let's go lay down, babe." I murmered.  She nodded still not saying a word.

I pealed back the blankets and helped Lauren into her side of the bed, reconvering her once she laid down.  I quickly walked to the other side of the bed and climbed in next to her.  We lay with a good foot in between us.  Her back faced me.  It felt so cold but I didn't want to push her,  I want her to be as comfortable as possible.  I heard her breath shudder again, I knew she was silently crying.  "Lolo," I whispered, putting my hand on her back.  She jumped by the contact but didn't move my hand away.  "What can I do to make it better, baby?"  I felt her shrug and she whimpered.  "Alright, well let me know, Lauren.  I love you." I rubbed circles in her back.

Her shoulders shook and she breathed heavily.  She turned to face me, "Camila?" Lauren said shakily.

"Yes baby?" I asked, trying to find her eyes in the darkness.

"You know what you can do to make it better?" she whispered, scooting a little closer to me.

"What?  What can I do Lauren?  I'll do anything." I said, a little to eagerly.

"Just hold me." she whispered starting to cry again.

I just nodded.  I pulled her closer to me and wrapped myself around her.  I held her tight to my chest.  She molded herself into me and intertwined her legs with mine.  I kissed her forehead and traced hearts on her hip bone with my index finger.  My other arm wraped around her tightly.  She took her arms and snaked around my waist.  I felt tears drip onto my chest.  "Shh, baby.  It's okay.  I'm here.  Nothing's gonna hurt you."  I cooed into her ear.

We laid there for what felt like hours, Lauren just crying into my chest while I held her.  Although she finally seemed to fall asleep, I couldn't get myself to fall asleep.  The sun finally rose, shining light into our room.  The sunlight danced acrossed Lauren's beautiful features.  I missed the sight of her sleeping in my arms, I just wish it wasn't in this state.  Lauren looked so fragile.  Her eyes were ringed with dark circles, her cheeks where red and spotted with black make up, her nose was rubbed raw.  I felt so bad for my baby.  What can I possibly do to help her?

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