Atë {BxB} ✔(#Wattys2017)

✨ 1

Part 1

As we got closer to our destination, I could feel a heavy layer of anxiety pulling me away from my comfort zone. The whole trip was silent. I looked out of the window to try and calm myself.

We'd left early, leaving the sky tainted pink and blue. The colours melted into each other as if the huge fingertip of a god had rubbed them in like a charcoal painting on a colossal, windy canvas. I pressed my hand against the thick pane, letting my fingertips feel the familiar sensation of glass and let it slide down slowly until it landed back onto my lap.

The driver stopped me two blocks away from the club where it was taking place. Not quite high-schoolish, I thought.

Steadily walking down the road, I held the small map that was sent to me with the invitation. Well this is is goddamn confusing. I scratched my left shoulder out of habit whilst thinking and looked up. All I saw were stores and garages. Not a person in sight. I walked to the limit of the pavement to see a lot of balloons on my left. Oh. Okay.

As I got closer, I sensed the sound of music being blasted inside. Just the thought of it sent a sharp sting into my brain, like a brain freeze. I hate loud things, they're like bullets hitting my eardrum in a rhythm. Boom, boom, boom.

Boom.

Simply making my way up the stairs to the entrance tired me and told me that my shoulders were carved of stone. Why do I feel like this? I pushed the door open, not feeling anything but my racing heartbeat. The result that came out of this was going to effect my train of thought for at least the following few months, and I was pretty damn convinced that I was going to make a fool of myself.

Okay, I just have to avoid human contact at all costs and check my phone every five minutes. Surely nothing bad will happen?

I found myself in a large, mid-lit room. Tinted the colour of cherry blood and melted blackcurrant jelly. I could've sworn that I felt vomit rise up my throat as my arms began to tingle from the sight of being surrounded by strangers. The sensation was the same as the one I had gotten when my hands felt the very same invitation. I should not be here.

But as I felt my knees getting weak, someone ran up to me and hugged me. Oh no, please no.

"Walter! Long time no see, my dude!" A tall man wrapped his arm around my neck, which forced my gravity to submit to it. I looked up to see an acquainted face.

"...Josh?"

Josh was the boy who'd forced my face to taste cold toilet water at least thirty times in the past. He'd even made his friends force me down on the ground whilst he held a steaming piece of metal against my chest(or face on unlucky occasions) or cut off pieces of my hair. Do you realise why this reunion was so horrible for me? Just thinking about it easily scratched open wounds that took years just to scab up. I understood that the scratches weren't going to just disappear but I felt as though I needed to let them rest for a bit.

You may ask "Oh, then why did you go to the party?" and that, my friend, is because the guilt of not going would've hurt just as much. Being invited to parties is like a situation of living an endless life with no meaning, or being damned to hell for all of eternity for no sin. No good.

"Yeah, dumbass! Couldn't forget a face like this, now could you?" He gave me a crooked grin which revealed yellow teeth, and one or two broken ones. I raised my eyebrows but still gave him a small smile because his seemed genuine.

Josh wasn't the same in high-school. He was the good-looking, athletic guy that had a new skirt scruff to tug on every week. He caught quite the amount of eyes with his bright red Letterman Jacket. Now, he wore a huge, stained sports shirt with one of the sleeves rolled up(revealing a hairy arm). He had a strongly receding hairline and an intense smell of vodka that attacked my nostrils.

Talking to him distracted me from my fear of facing the past, exchanging it with a fear of communication.

He suddenly saw another girl and sprinted up to her with a look he seemed to think was attractive on his face. I guess he hasn't changed that much. As he walked away from me, I took my chance to flee into the crowd. It wasn't any better, but there was no direct conversing involved at least.

All my eyes could meet were wasted people. I didn't find anything exceptionally wrong about excessive drinking, but being surrounded by meat filled with alcohol wasn't exactly my ideal relaxation spot.

I walked up to the bar and cornered myself in the least tightened area(still ending up next to two people vigorously making out right next to me).

"You're here with your classmates?"

I gulped, on the verge of correcting him about such a horrid mistake. But having understood what he meant, I nodded and sat down on a sweaty stool. At least the music wasn't as deafening over there.

"Are you gonna order?"

Embarrassed, I shook my head. He raised an eyebrow in suspicion but quickly shrugged and turned away to take the other people's orders.

...

Uneventful minutes passed. I'd gotten up to look for Josh at some point(I was desperate, trust me) and had a girl follow me everywhere like a piece of blue bubblegum rolled up in thick black hair.

But in the end of the hassle, I didn't find Josh. I suspected that he'd left home with some girls so I made up my mind and bailed.

Rushing out of that underground hell was glorious and I felt all the sanity rush back into my brain and my heart's pumps even out. Deciding to walk it to the closest bus stop, I let my mouth finally smile and began humming and strolling down the streets.

Good choice, Walt.

Good choice.

As I walked, I looked at the sky. It had gotten dark, I guess I had spent more than a few minutes having a crisis in the corner of a bar. The area was lit up by some yellow lights and a fading grey-blue sky. Is that even how the sky works? Unconsciously, I'd stopped walking and was just standing and staring at the heavens above me, until I was interrupted by a loud rustle.

I flinched and turned around. Nothing. I'm getting out of here. Wrapping my arms over each other to "protect" myself, I began walking faster. The further I got the more the rustling increased until I basically sprinted to the bus stop. I sat at the edge of the pavement and panted heavily. Lord.

"It's no use waiting here, you know."

My heart hit my back and I stumbled to get back up, only to see a boy smiling at me.

"Why the hell did you do that?"

a/n:

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