Swasan SS - Ice King

3.Nightmares

Sharmishta Bose was one of the most independent women on earth. No, she was not some kind of irksome feminist, but she knew when and where to apply force or let loose depending on the situation. She stood straight, her roots firmly planted on realistic earth and her head held high with esteem. She was a woman who knew exactly where her brain, heart and their interconnections should be kept.
Her acquaintance with the Maheshwaris came through her ex husband, Shekar Gadodia, but her continue strong bond with the above family had no part of his. She had a strong friendship with Annapurna Maheshwari, who in her own terms was a perfect match to Sharmishta. She did not belong to the independent category where Sharmishta belonged, but to a different one altogether. She was the kind of woman who did not fight for her view as Sharmishta did, but had a strong charm of influence that at the end made everything go according to her preference.
And Swara came under the shelter of both these extraordinary creatures and had absorbed some part of their qualities to her own character. It was what Sharmishta had intended when she let Swara bond with the Maheshwaris, she wanted her to be as independent as she was in her youth; strong enough to withstand any storm the destiny threw her way. In present Swara was exactly that, vibrant and strong, but she was not always trending on that path in her past.
There was a slight drizzle when Sharmishta came out of the airport, not exactly paying any attention to Swara’s continuous chatter about Lakshya’s birthday party that afternoon. The twilight greeted them hesitantly and the once home city looked a ghost of her past. Sharmishta was annoyed by Swara’s visit to her father, angered at the fact that even now the man yielded enough power to hurt her child. She could easily see through Swara’s pretended mask of cheerfulness.
She sighed as they sat in the car, the beginnings of a migraine scorching her nerves. She had always made sure no one, after Shakar held that much power over her child; that their simple withdrawal from her life would shatter her like his had done. There was one other case; she had dealt most fluently in the past.
The rain now washing the windscreen, blurring the road ahead reminded her of that particular night, when she had met a young Sanskar days before they left the country forever. It was the last time she had ever seen him and she remembered every line of his features to perfection.
It was a time when the Maheshwaris were rising back from a crisis in their business and even Sanskar’s hand was needed at the deck; he was merely an eighteen year old. From the weariness in his dimmed eyes to the tightly shut jaw he seemed to have had as much a bad day as Sharmishta had; but he smiled at her brilliantly. She knew what kind of a position she held in his eyes and of cause was extremely fond of him. But there was a tad of insecurity in her heart where Swara was concerned. Sanskar and Swara were inseparable; he was slowly becoming her weakness, a restrain that Sharmishta did not approve.
‘Do you know Swara refused to accompany me when I leave for London?’ She asked him and he looked innocently surprised.
‘She did?’ He said.
‘Yes. She thinks that she can live with your family, finish her education here. She’s choosing to leave her mother instead of leaving her friends behind Sanskar.’
She tried with genuine want to layer her words with emotions. She wanted Sanskar to understand her dilemma, help her overcome it.
‘She thinks that by staying here, she can reunite her father and me. You and I both know what kind of a fairy tale that is.’
She paused.
‘I didn’t raise her to believe in such fantasies. But I think in your protection she has turned in to an entirely different character. She seems to think that you can protect her against any obstacle in life, as you have been doing since your childhood. This mirage of hers has to be broken. You are human not some god watching over her!’
Sanskar listened to her; although he did not speak she could see understanding etching across his features as her speech progressed. His face darkened with her each word.
‘You want me to server ties with my best friend?’ He asked at the end. ‘Because our friendship is spoiling her..?’
‘No,’ said Sharmishta. “I want you to loosen the tight hold around this friendship, move forward, and spread wide. There can be many more friends for both of you, many more opportunities, and a life out of this tiny bubble of yours.’
He watched her blankly for a moment.
*
Now the rain was pouring down, as if heavens were split open by an invisible sword of evil and it spilled on earth endlessly. Occasional flashes of lightening illuminated the purplish gray and midnight blue shades of the sky.
Sanskar stood at the glass wall in his penthouse once more. This time his focus was on the gloomy sky and the occasional angry flashes across it. There was a calculating look in his eyes, similar to a predator just a moment before it pounced on the pray, crouching for the perfect moment. The time to execute his plan was nearing.
A strange sensation shot through his heart as if it was openly beating under the cold sheets of rain and he recalled the same feeling associated with another memory of his, which had a connection to the conversation replaying in Sharmishta’s mind. But it was not that he remembered but a later conversation, with Kavita.
At that time she was not his girlfriend, but a study mate who prepared notes for him when he missed classes. She was the brightest in his class and even then managed to capture his attention on a different level. They were pouring over their accounts books when he told her what Sharmishta aunty had said about his best friend. Kavita did not say anything for a moment as she bookmarked the point where she had been rewriting something and folded her arms before looking at him.
‘Do you know what you should do if you wanted to turn a Savanna in to a forest?’ She asked casually.
‘What Kavi? How did we suddenly switch in to ecology?’
She narrowed her eyes and shook her head, a tiny smile playing on her lips.
‘You remove the elephants,’ she said. ‘They eat the plants that grow there, making it grassland, that’s why they are called a key species.’ She stretched out an arm and shut his book. The orange light of the library shone in her eyes. ‘My point is that your aunty wants her daughter to become strong and self established, you are the elephant there.’
Sanskar watched her bewildered.
‘She depends upon you; she would never learn to live herself, your attention is spoiling the child. There will come a time when both of you need to move separately in your lives, you can’t protect her forever Sanskar, she need to learn to live without you.’
‘So you say I should listen to her?’
‘What I say is that, you need to let her grow. Who knows may be she’ll turn in to a further fascinating person?’
Her words fainted in to his memory. Indeed that time has come and that too, a little more drastically than he had imagined then. And reluctantly he realized what that feeling was. It was the knowledge inside him that he despised, the knowledge that he was about to hurt Shona again.
*
It was years later Swara knew that her recollections of that night was somewhat faulty. It was when the storm finally rolled in with its full force to her life. The celebrations of Lakshya’s birthday was not yet over, he still wanted to celebrate with his friends a little away from his father’s controlling and all seeing gaze.
Swara didn’t mind it much, his friends were a cherry crowd and to her relief Ragini was there, although a little cautiously. After all her household did not approve hanging out in parties, Swara was sure Dadi had no idea where Ragini was at the moment. They sat in a corner, chatting paying less attention to everyone else. Soon Ragini had let go of her fear and they laughed over some joke Laksh had just said.
He stood up, still chuckling and asked her for a dance. Swara had no intention of dancing with him but Ragini and the others were urging her to. Their smiling faces were the last vivid images in her memory. Everything from that point onwards was hazy, blurry and almost nonexistent.
Her memory consisted of some patch worked incidents of what came next, there was a lot of noise and dazzling lights. Her vision was spinning and her balance faint. She was not sure if she was with Lakshya and the others or not as the conversations around her made no sense any more. People pushed past her almost throwing her off balance on to the ground when someone caught her elbow.
‘Laksh?’ She muttered doubtfully. Whoever it was they did not answer her as she was steered through the crowd safely. She was held in a protective embrace as the blinding lights and the incoherent conversations finally started to rub her nerves. Her legs no longer obeyed her brain and she was not sure if there was ground beneath them or not.
Whoever holding her, she held on to him for dear life. He smelled familiar, some smell that she connected with her childhood, or simply the warm summer air.
‘You are Laksh aren’t you?’ She said feverishly as he placed her on a deep plush sofa. She sank in to it as he kept her feet on it as well. ‘Aren’t you?’
‘Yes I am,’ he said finally and she smiled faintly. ‘Sleep Shona,’ his fingers brushed over her hair. ‘You’re safe.’
‘Don’t call me Shona!’ She snapped at him sleepily. ‘Only Sanskar calls me that!’ Her voice fainted as she sank in to a deep slumber.
*
Wherever he dwelled in those past five years, devil lurked in the corners. Even the penthouse was so full of shadows, slowly engulfing him in his immense pain. Swara, sleeping peacefully on the sofa was completely unbefitting his décor. He could not tolerate watching her any longer.
Irritated he checked his phone, how dim can Lakshya actually be. Does it take him hours to notice that his fiancée is missing?
Involuntarily he glanced at her. She muttered something in her sleep. Like a flame on his shell of ice, her innocence burned his insides. Made him momentarily drop his agenda and watch her, stare at her, wandering how someone so innocent survived this cruel world?
She is just a pawn, he mentally smacked himself.
But somewhere a part of her best friend was still alive too. Finally his phone beeped.
Attending the call he simply listened for a long moment.
‘Fine,’ he said at the end. ‘Inform Mr. Maheshwari Miss Bose is here. I’m leaving for some urgent work; you know how to handle the matter from here on.’
He disconnected the call and walked to the door. At the threshold he turned around to watch her one last time. She was still asleep, he thought jealously, when he had not slept for many years. Perhaps he was somewhere in her dreams still, he did not actually care.
‘We’ll meet again soon Shona,’ he muttered. ‘Sweet dreams.’
His lips curled at the irony of the situation. The worst nightmare she was ever going to have was wishing her sweet dreams, was that even possible?
*