STOP ! STOP ! STOP !
I beg of you. I'm hurting more and more and more everyday. Happiness doesn't have a home here. All because I've been experiencing excruciating pain for the last twenty years. I left the pain at the exit door over a year ago. But for some twisted - wicked reason, the pain always reappears. People use the love word, like it has no meaning or its just a game when it comes to someone's feelings. For the first time EVER as a adult,I fell in love. I say as a adult, because I once did when I was a kid, and then love wasn't really love. Yet a figment of imagination. As I watch my surroundings closely day in and day out . I began to actually explore and inquire what really happy, a very wise person once said to me, " The creative adult is the ABUSED & CONFUSED child who SURVIVED. " There are a lot of people who may not know this, I'm one of them. A lot of people look at me and judge me, all because of my looks. When I'm with someone I'm with that guy only, like I am now. What I mean when I'm with that guy, that means he's mines. I don't share, with outsiders, so yes I'm selfish. He has all of me, and only him. I maybe told I don't have the look of a faithful person. But guess what, looks are pretty damn deceiving and I guess I'm one of them. I'm perfectly imperfect. I try my best to be better than what people think of me. I'm a hopeless romantic, when you've experienced so many things and continue to encounter the same pain, from the same people, love soon becomes your escape. If the love isn't real, it won't last long. I love loving love when I have extremely blessed reason to love loving love.
