At Your Side (A Dragon Age fanfiction)

Poor Thing

"All I'm asking you to do is listen, Hawke."

"Varric, your judgment in this case isn't the best. If it were anyone but Merrill ..."

The statement hit uncomfortably close to home, so he leaped to deny it. "I don't get caught up in all that nonsense. Blood magic, templars, mages ... the whole argument gives me a headache."

Hawke looked at him skeptically, but then relented, as he'd known she would. "Fine. Let's go see her."

They didn't talk as they ambled through Lowtown toward the alienage. Varric cast glances up at his friend, but for once he couldn't think of anything to say.

Merrill was waiting for them inside her home, pacing up and down and wringing her hands. "Oh, Varric, you came! And Hawke, thank you!"

"Don't thank me yet, Merrill. I'm still waiting to hear why it's so important that we go to Sundermount. Something about your mirror?"

The elf cast a despairing glance at the elaborate structure in the corner of her bedroom. "It won't do anything! It doesn't even reflect. A mirror is supposed to reflect, at least, even if it won't help me unlock my people's secrets."

"I don't see how I can help with that," Hawke said. "I'm not a mirror-maker."

"No, of course not. I know how to fix it. You see, the demon that helped me cleanse the first shard I found is trapped, held in a cave above Sundermount. I need to go there, to get the answers straight from the demon's mouth." Merrill squared her shoulders, facing Hawke steadfastly.

"Oh, yes," said Hawke. "Because you can certainly trust whatever a demon says. 'Why, of course, Merrill, let me just help you with that mirror. Oh, me? I don't want anything ... other than your soul and your body, that is. You won't mind giving those up, will you?'"

Merrill frowned at the sarcasm. "You sound like Fenris."

Hawke smiled. "Fenris wouldn't have come here in the first place, and if he had, he would have killed you the second you stopped speaking, just to prevent you from doing something so foolish and dangerous. Merrill, you're a powerful mage. If you turn abomination, a lot of people could be hurt."

"I know. That's why I need you to come with me. If I— If I fail, I need you to kill me."

Varric couldn't restrain the cry that came to his lips. "Daisy, no!"

She looked at him with affection. "Dear Varric. Now you see why I needed Hawke. She can do it, if it needs to be done."

"Is there no way to talk you out of this?" Hawke asked.

Merrill shook her head. "I have to do this for my people. Before we lose our history altogether."

Hawke looked from the stubborn elf to the dwarf and back before sighing. "Very well, Merrill. Meet me at the gates tomorrow morning." Outside, in the alienage, she turned to Varric. "We're bringing Anders with us. He's our resident expert on abominations, after all."

"Not bringing Broody?"

"And put up with his sulking all the way to Sundermount and back? No, thank you."

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Varric met them at the gates the next morning: Blondie, glowering as darkly as ever the broody elf could have; Daisy, nervous but determined; Hawke, sad and resigned; and the Rivaini, looking as relaxed and ready for anything as ever, but Varric could see the tension in her.