Chapter One

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(Warning: contains swearing!)

Nancy's P.O.V.

I wake up in my room at my aunt's house, realising I had slept over. I sigh and get up, dragging myself over to the bathroom to do morning stuff. After getting dressed, I move  Aunt Aggie away from the flour and wave her goodbye, heading over to the Green's.

Just when I reach the front gate I see Aunt Isabel rushing out, looking like a mess with her coat inside out. I point this out to her and let myself in.

"Vincent, you can go brush the piglets. Megsie, feed the hens and collect the eggs. I'm going to go check on the barley." The two left, and I chose that time to emerge as I jumped up onto Norman's back, wrapping my legs around his middle and my arms around his neck. "Can I come with you?" I say, leaning down to look at him with a mischievous grin. He sighs and starts walking, me still attached to his back. I frowned, hitting him upside the head. "Ow, the hell was that for?" He asked, ducking slightly. "Not even a hello? Wow do I sure feel special." I said sarcastically as he mumbled a hello, but he was smiling.

When we reached the tractor he put me down and then walked around to the other side and got in. We started to talk a bit. "Hey Norman, isn't that your uncle Phil?" I ask, looking at the man walking towards us in the distance. He sighed and nodded. I subconsciously grab his hand to reassure him and he grazes my knuckles with his thumb as the infuriating man draws closer. "You could always run him over with the tractor." I whisper in his ear and he snickers.

"Hey Norman, how're you doin'? And Nancy too, ain't that lovely!" He says, with a fake smile that makes me want to puke. The man himself isn't so bad but he's so damned persistent over selling the farm that it makes me hate him. Norman replies while I just stay there silently. I hear him ask about Norman's idea to get money for the farm and the tractor, and when Norman replies I turn my head to glare at him. Phil says a few more fake lines and leaves. When he does, Norman starts driving back to the farm and I shove him.
"Hey, I'm driving!" He yells, as he tries to get the tractor back on a straight path.

"Why the hell did you tell Phil about the piglets? Now he's going to want to ruin the plan somehow!" Norman rolls his eyes.
"I think you're being a bit too paranoid."
"And I think you're being a bit too stupid."
He smiles at me fondly and shakes his head. "How rude. Wouldn't want any possible suitors to overhear that, now, would we? Mother would simply die of a heart attack!" He teases, smirking. I glare at him some more and fave the other way, letting go of his hand that I had still been holding, but I couldn't help the small smile that danced across my lips. He grinned. "See? It's fine."

"NORMAN! NORMAN COME QUICK!" We heard from the general direction of the farm, not realising we had already arrived. We quickly jumped out of the tractor and ran over to see what Megsie was yelling about. "Oh hey Nancy wAIT I HAVE SOMETHING IMPORTANT TO SAY LOOK ITS THE COUSINS!"
"What?"
"What?"
"The cousins arrived early!"

Sure enough, there in front of the farm was a fancy motorcar. The front door opened and a chauffeur stepped out.
"They have a chauffeur." Megsie breathed. I noticed Vince making faces at one of the windows and made a motion with my arm telling him to come to me. He did and I pulled him next to me, watching as another door opened, and a boy who looked around Norman's age stepped out. He had long blonde hair and brown eyes, along with an ugly yellow and brown checkered suit and brown shoes. My first thought was 'he's not nearly as handsome as Norman.' My second was 'since when did I like Norman like that?!' My third was 'who the hell is screeching?' I looked around to see the chauffeur holding a girl by the legs and trying to pull her out of the car as she held onto what appeared to be a mini fridge and shrieked obscenities and something about shoes.

"It appears I've arrived in Poo land. Goat poo, Cow poo, Pig poo, Sheep poo, why, its the National British Museum of Poo. Hello Poo man, do you speak English? I come from far away, from the land of soap, and indoor toilets." He said, finishing with a flourish.

Norman looked angry and stepped forward but I lay a hand on his arm, stopping him as I looked at the immature stranger. He took out something wrapped in foil and I heard Vince gasp. "I-is that a Fry's chocolate bar with Cinder-crunch topping?" He asked innocently, stepping closer to the boy. The stranger nodded, smiling in a twisted way as he bent down slightly. "Yes it is, would you like some?" I glared at him as he used a mocking tone with Vincent. The poor boy nodded, and the stranger smirked as he took the last of it in his hand. "Pity, there's none left." He said as he put it in his mouth. Why that foul, loathsome, evil cockroach! I ought to- I only noticed I had stepped forward when two arms wrapped around my waist, preventing me from continuing.

I trained my glare on Norman instead. "Let me go!" I hissed, returning my glare to the stranger. "No." He said firmly, making me want to strangle him. "Norman, if you don't let me go right now, I swear-" I was cut off by a louder than average shriek as the pink bitch kicked the poor chauffeur and he fell backwards into the muddy water. I winced as he stood up, his no doubt expensive outfit now ruined.

"I'm sorry miss Celia, I promise I'll tell your mother but right now you have to stay here. Mister Cyril if you'd be so kind, just take miss Celia's clothes for now, thank you." He handed the stranger, who I assumed was named Cyril,  a large bunch of boxes and he staggered under the weight. I was too busy staring at the seemingly insane girl to hear the boy's next insult but I did however feel Norman's arms unwrapping from my waist as the man drove off and I did see him and Megsie and Vince start to chase after the infuriating boy, who threw the boxes that contained the girl's clothes at them, making them open and fall in the mud and such as the trio stepped in them and kicked at them as they ran past. The girl, Celia, started screeching again.

I laughed and started running with them, stepping on the girl's clothes as I went.

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