RAnDoMNeSs

Bad Jokes

You're welcome.

Did you hear about the race between the lettuce and the tomato? No.

Why did the toilet paper roll down the hill? Because of gravity.

What do you call a talking turtle? Fictional.

What's the difference between an apple and an orange? They're different fruits.

What is green, has six legs, and would kill you if it fell out of a tree? A pool table.

What's more dangerous than running with scissors? Falling on them.

What is red and is bad for your teeth? A brick.

What are the similarities between a cigarette and a hamster? They are both perfectly harmless until you put them in your mouth and light them on fire.

Why did the tooth fairy not take the tooth? Because she doesn't exist.

Why didn't the astronaut cross the road? He wasn't on the planet.

Did you hear about the pony who lost both left hooves? It's really hard for him to walk now.

Why can't dinosaurs clap? Because they are dead.

*laugh track*