I don't remember the last time I smiled, a genuine smile at least. Every picture I've taken, every smile I displayed ... was all fake. It was all a lie.
It all started 3 years ago, with the stupidest decision I've made, a mistake.
It started with you taking away my innocence...
my securities ..
my time...
my perfections..
my personality...
my friends ...
part of me...
my heart ....
my soul....
Now all that's left of me is...
my insecurities...
my imperfections.
my dark side.
the part of me that I hate .
my souless body.
my broken heart...
How is it that you took away everything in a heartbeat? When it took me years establish everything I ever had...
To be honest... pretending hurts.
Pretending to be fine while I'm falling apart, pieces of me breaking away, fading into darkness, slowly disappearing from the surfaces of the earth, vanishing into thin air is definitely not fine.
Pretending to smile while I'm crying inside.. trapped alone in the darkness hurts.
Pretending to stay calm every time I hear your name was always an act. Why? Because I'm afraid of history repeating itself.
Every single word you ever said comes back to my mind like a boomerang when I hear your name, all the memories, happy or sad rushes back to my mind, even though I thought I had already erased them...
It hurts you know, it really does.
