THE EDGE (ManxMan)

Chapter 1.

>Picture of Casper Allen played by Devin Paisley.

For the past five years I've been hiding like the coward I am; hiding from everyone and from the pack. I knew they needed me; I needed them, but I'm a coward. My pack needed me, my family needed me, and what did I give them in return? I ran, I ran everywhere and nowhere just so I could get rid of the feeling of rejection that he cast upon me- being young and in love was not all flower's and hearts that majority of the romance novels I've read during my High School life portrayed.

But what was I supposed to do and not run? I was only 18 at the time and rejection was not something that I was used to, especially from my own mate. Shit like that fucks up a person, y'know? Mum and Dad were so ecstatic about crowning me the new Alpha, they were looking forward to getting some rest from the Pack; don't get me wrong, both of them loved our people, but being in the business for over 20 years made them realise that they need a break. Dad always said I didn't have to become the new Alpha and one of the other family member's would step up if needed, but I didn't want to disappoint him, and I agreed to ruling the Pack.

Oh boy, how wrong was I not to disappoint him- I've done it with me leaving and not telling them why I left. Son of the year, everyone!

In a way, I shouldn't be blaming myself- it takes two to make another life; I had the option of aborting the baby, but I just couldn't make myself to do it. Our baby was made from two people making love; and although it wasn't their fault that their other father left me, I blamed myself for the reason why the Goddess is playing such a cruel trick on me. To both punish and reward me at the same time? What have I done to deserve that?

Everything was beautiful at first, we were so happy for two years. We were childhood friends since our Packs were one of the strongest ones in the country-his was the strongest in the whole world-and our families were good friends as well. I knew I was attracted to guys since I was little, and the only person that knew was Cassie and of course, Felix. That's how we started going out, on my 16th birthday something hit me and my wolf spoke, he spoke to me so strongly like he never spoken to me before and that's when I realised I was in love with the person who I looked up to, admired, loved to laugh with.

The feeling was mutual, well, at least I thought it was. Now that I look back, it was a one way road. However, back when I was young, naïve and stupid, it felt as if our souls spoke to one another. We started going out with one another, and he would be the sweetest thing ever; telling me how much he loved me, how much he wanted me every day. He would protect me and he made sure that I had everything I needed. There was just one thing that I laugh at now- we kept the whole relationship a secret, and not because both of us were guys. Everyone, in whatever pack they are, believe that finding a mate of the same gender is a blessing and that we don't have a choice, it just happens.

We kept the relationship a secret because Felix was three years older than me and he was at a prestige University, where only a small group of werewolves attended. The rest of the student body were humans. To some humans, we are the spawn's of Satan and we are looked down upon, that's the thing both of us weren't ready for, even though I knew Casper JR couldn't get up for girls, I still wasn't ready to come out to the whole world.

Skip a few years, my dear mate suddenly rejected me without giving me any reason, but deep inside my heart I knew that he feared the future and this fear was eating him from the inside. I never told him that I got pregnant after we had sex; I told nobody except my best friend and my twin sister, Hannah and Cassie. Hannah was in the same pack as Felix and they were cousins, so she knew about everything, about our secret relationship and that I got pregnant.

Both of them helped me to run away; Hannah had a friend who was in a similar situation and she helped me flee to France. I always loved that country and the language; my family originated from there so since I was little I taught myself French.  I've spend five years there, with Nathen and his baby boy, Trevor, who was the same age as my little Beau.