Beck + Call (Eswell, ASOUE)

Beck + Call

"Why do you want me today?"

Esmé raised an eyebrow. She'd just finished inviting the woman on the other end of the phone to her upscale penthouse for the night, an offer the optometrist usually couldn't resist. She'd spent the afternoon shopping for a new lingerie set, and had laboured over whether to choose red lace or black lace. She eventually settled on red, rushing home to call Georgina. Now, sitting in her new lingerie set with blood-red lips and eyeliner so sharp it could cut, she thought she'd heard her wrong.

"Whatever do you mean?"

Georgina sighed. "Can you answer me straight for once?"

Esmé had to bite her tongue to keep from making the obvious joke. "Darling, I want you because you're you. No one else is as mesmerizing, as - dare I say - hypnotizingly sexy. And besides," she said, her voice dropping to a sultry low tone, "I purchased something new especially for tonight. I'm sure you'll love it."

Esmé paused, expecting to hear the smile in Georgina's voice as she confirmed she'd be over in half an hour. Instead, she was met with an irritated huff. "Esmé, you buy new things every day."

"Yes, but most of the things I buy are for me. This is for you."

"What are we?"

Esmé was so surprised to hear this question that she pulled the phone away from her ear to stare at it for a few moments.

They weren't dating. They were sexually involved, of course, but when that question is asked, a discussion about romance and feelings usually ensues. Romance and feelings were subjects Esmé refrained from discussing, especially in regards to herself. Of course, she liked Georgina. But for Esmé, the line between 'like' and 'love' was so blurred she'd stopped trying to define it. I'll know when I know, she always thought to herself, but after many attempted relationships and a shitty marriage, she never knew. So when she met Georgina and was instantly attracted to her, she didn't bother trying to work out her feelings. She just went with it.

Apparently Georgina didn't have the same philosophy.

"We're friends with benefits, I suppose," Esmé said finally. "Two people who enjoy each other's company and have amazing sex." She smirked. "I must say darling, I didn't take you for the sort to ask something like that."

"I have a right to know what's going on," Georgina grumbled.

"Well, now you know."

"Do I?"

Esmé blinked. Georgina sounded confrontational all of a sudden.

"Do you want me because you love me, or you love yourself?"

"What does that even mean?" Esmé asked. The word 'love' echoed in her mind.

"Do you think it's fun to wind me up and set me spinning? Am I fun to play with, like your own toy?" Georgina's voice became louder with each word.

"You're not making any sense," Esmé told her.

"Esmé, you do this same shit every time I hear from you." Georgina was exasperated. "You call me, we meet, and we fuck. You act interested in my life but when I want to tell you something about me you brush me off. And when I ask you anything remotely personal, you change the subject. Yet you keep calling, you keep acting interested, and then you stop. I think you're playing with me."

"Where did this come from?" Esmé blurted. "I mean, what the fuck? Sorry for not being Olivia goddamn Caliban, but I can't read your mind," she huffed.

"You know what, never mind," Georgina said. "Forget I brought this up."

"Are you still coming over?" Esmé asked, her voice a little softer.