is he really? 🛁 Jyatt

005

[t.w]

Me, Finn, Jack, Sophia, Chosen, Jeremy, and Jae's relatives were all front row.

I had so many people come up to me tonight, they knew how much we meant to each other. And I think they knew how much we loved each other, we tried to hide, but it's hard to hide love. We were oh so obvious.

Ms.Lieberher finished up her speech and looked at me, "Wyatt..."

I nodded and shakily made my way up to the podium. Nerves and because I've barely ate this week.

"First I'm going to read a quote from our movie, 'It', since it's what brought us so close together.

When you're a kid, you think that you'll always be... protected, and cared for. Then, one day, you realize that's not true. If you open your eyes, you will see what we're going through. 'Cause when you're alone as a kid, the monsters see you as weaker. You don't even know they're getting closer. Until it's too late. "

The cast is crying even harder.

Now, the letter.

The letter has been burning a hole in my pocket since Ms.Lieberher gave it to me last week.

I take the letter out of my back pocket and carefully tear it open, which seemed like ages. I cleared my throat again, and take out the letter.

Tears brim my eyes and I accidentally drop the piece of paper.

I pick it up and unfold it.

Tears flow down my face.

I glance at everyone for two seconds before standing straight up and beginning.

Dear Wyguy,

I'm sorry​ if you can't read my handwriting, in shaking really bad, obviously. I just downed some pills so I'm trying to hurry.

Wyatt, I'm deeply, madly, in love with you. But you already know that. But I want everyone to know that. That's why I'm having you read this out loud.

But I just couldn't take it. Being constantly told to "kill yourself" and having to hide what we share. Having to hide something so beautiful. But i was only trying to protect you.

If I'm not there to make people mad because I hold your hand, kiss those damn lips, run my fingers through your beautiful hair, and look at you with all the love in my body, you'll have a much easier life.

I don't know if I can continue.

You'll find someone new, marry a nice girl, have a kid or two, and never get hate because of someone you "love".

I'm not worthy enough to be loved by such an amazing human being, Wy.

But I want everyone to know there was more. I was always so fucking sad. But Wyatt made me forget. But that also made him hurt by the awful things people sad.

And I care more about him thank anything else. This was for the best, baby.

                          Love,
                                    Jae-Jae

p.s.
       I have a private letter for you. I slipped it under your mattress last time I came over.

I looked up from the letter, sobbing, just like everyone else.