The Perfect Day Gone Wrong

Chapter Three

  Some days are really hard. Especially at school. Everyone talks about what happened. Everyone asks if I'm okay. Megan and I haven't gone to the beach since Kevin's death. She acts as if it wasn't a big deal. She seems to want to just go and do stuff without me. I know Kevin and her weren't the beasties of friends but I know she misses him. Nights are even longer and colder. Without him, everything seems dull. I'm sitting in the bathroom, it seems like the only room in the house where I can have some peace and quiet. I see a razor sitting in the bathtub. I pick it up and without knowing it I put the cold razor against a clean canvas and I create art. Blood drips everywhere.

"Honey are you in there? Are you okay?" My mom is concerned about me and every hour she checks up on me.

"Uhh, yeah mom I'm fine everything's fine." She leaves and I put sweats on and go to bed. I past mom's and Adams room, and Adams on the phone with someone, he seems mad. I just ignore it and go to bed.

The next day I go to Kevin's house and gather what I want. I walk into a room that was full of hope and dreams but is now empty with sorrow. I see his phone on the bed.

" I thought you might want to go through it, sweety."

I open it and start to cry as I see a beautiful picture of us together. I go through the notepad. He writes personal things in there all the time. He talks how much he loves me and how he never wants to lose me. I leave his room and go to school, I couldn't stay in there a minute longer. It seems like the same thing, only now it's winter.

Winter, it's always cold outside but people love it. They love playing in the snow and they going inside and sitting by a fire, cuddling with a loved one and sipping hot cocoa. Inside it feels like winter. I feel cold and lonely. I want someone to cheer me up. But lately, the only thing that cheers me up is a cold razor against my skin.

I remember Kevin would always check me for bruises, or even scratch marks. He cared about me. Whenever I told him I was feeling down, he would always try and lift my spirit.

"Hey. I heard about Kevin. Are you okay?" A voice came from behind me. It was Ethan. Ethan was popular. On the football team, and never acknowledged me before.

I look at him and start sobbing. He hugs me a tries to calm me down. We're in the library.

"Maybe we should go outside?" He asked.

"Yeah. I'm so sorry." I say wiping tears from my face. Ethan helps me with my books, and we go outside. I sit on the cement. It's warm. He sits next to me. For a while, it's just quite. Ethan never talked to me. His mother was my mothers boss. I knew him since I was a little kid, yet we've never talked. Ethan was being sweet and kind.

"So, like, uhh." Ethan tried to talk. He couldn't

"It's okay. You can leave. I'll be okay."

"No, it's okay really. I can stay. Besides, you're not okay." He says. "I saw the cuts, and I know they aren't scratch marks, trust me, I know what place your in right now."

We start to talk. The bell then rings. I feel a sensation that I've never felt before. I don't know what it is. Ethan helps me up and walks me to class before I leave him, he gives me a notecard. I open it up to see his number.

"If you ever need anyone to talk to, just call me." Ethan smiles and walks away.

I nervously called Ethan a couple nights later. We practically talked all night. He tells me jokes and says that he has always thought I was pretty. I bet Kevin would like Ethan. Ethan is sweet and cares about me. I feel like I'm with Kevin when I talk with Ethan. I look at the time on my phone. It says 3:46 am. 

"Wow! We've been talking all night. I need to get some sleep." I say to Ethan ending our conversation.

"Okay. See you at school. Good night." Ethan says. He hangs up the phone. I feel so happy. 

I wake up late for school in the morning.  At school I see Ethan waiting for me by my locker. I go to my locker, he stands and stares. I feel his eyes looking me up and down, but it didn't feel weird. After school, Ethan walks me home. He asks if I want to go to the beach, I decline and go inside. The minute I get through the door, Adam is standing on the stairs. I ask him what's up, but he just looks at me and goes upstairs. I follow him, he goes into the bathroom and locks himself in there. I try to talk to him, but I don't know what to say. I leave him in the bathroom, he's pounding the wall.

When my mom gets home, Adam walks out of the bathroom and acts as if nothing ever happened.