The Nearness of You

Chapter 18

Livy had finally gotten the children fed an into bed. They had to share a room, which was probably for the best since they were so frightened. Gabriel had watched her warily as she had bathed the two little ones with Raoul's help. She had nothing to dress them in so Maria was put into a clean diaper and she found t-shirts for Gabriel and the other little girl, who was named Ilsa.

She had checked on them a second time and was on her way downstairs when the front door opened and Declan entered, looking more tired than she had ever seen him.

She didn't say anything as they stared at each other across the long expanse of hall.

"Would you liked something to eat? Raoul went to bed, but I was just about to make myself something." She nodded towards the kitchen.

He nodded. "Yes, but may I change first?" He looked down at his wrinkled shirt with a grimace.

"Sure, take your time," she said, stepping off the last step as Declan approached and moved to pass her.

She knew he had a lot going on and that there was a lot he was worried about, but she could save him one worry at least. She placed her hand on his arm to stop him and he looked down at her and then her hand. "I'll stay Declan. We'll get married, and I'll help you make sure the children are safe."

He closed his eyes and took a deep shuddering breath. When he opened them his eyes met hers "Are you sure? What if it takes longer than two years?"

"I'll stay Declan." Her voice was calm and sure as she said the words because she had discovered in the last few hours, while she worried and waited for his return, that the only place she wanted to be was with him, and the children were an instant bonus. She had a family again.

He reached for her and pulled her close holding her tight as if he was a sinking man and she was the only thing keeping him afloat. Livy fought back tears as she wrapped her arms around him. After a few minutes, he pulled away and looked down at her, brushing some hair out of her face. "I don't want to destroy you," his voice was barely a whisper.

"Why would you destroy me, how could you?" She was truly confused by his words.

He shook his head. "It's a genetic trait."

"That's the dumbest thing I ever heard!" Livy exclaimed, stepping back to look up at him, trying to gauge how serious he really was.

He grabbed her and kissed her hard, making every cell in her body come alive. As soon as the kiss started it ended and he turned and moved up the stairs, leaving Livy more confused than she had been at his ridiculous statement.

In the kitchen, she started to pull out the fixings for omelets and had the first one in the pan when he joined her. She told him he was welcome to set the small table by the window, and he did while she finished cooking.

As they sat down to eat Livy kept looking at him, wondering what he had meant by his earlier statement, but Declan remained silent until had finished his last bite, then he sat back watching her and she watched him, trying to will him into answering her question.

"You want me to answer your question?"

"Yes," she said between gritted teeth.

He nodded. "Alright, but first answer mine. The only way this will work, the only way we will get through these next two years is if we are completely honest with each other, no matter how much it hurts us or how uncomfortable it makes us."

"What question are you talking about?" Livy thought back, trying her hardest to remember.

"When you were sick, you mentioned that my relationship with your father wasn't the only thing that you were thinking about." He waited while she thought back