Nail Biter

3

“Gwen, please, show me your hand?”

“No, David.”

“Gwen, you've gotten blood on your shirt.”

Gwen looked down at her fist, balled up and hiding her nails behind the fabric of her shirt. A small spot of red had indeed managed to soak through. Upon noticing, she flinched. A stab of pain ran down her ring finger. Her stomach twisted. Was she bleeding from two nails at once? She clenched her fist tighter and turned her body to angle herself away from David. She turned her hand to the side and checked. She wasn't bleeding from her ring finger, but it still hurt. The skin under her nail was slightly more visible than it had been before. Definitely not a good sign.

It was dark outside. Though daytime tended to be fairly warm, by the time the sun set, the campgrounds cooled down considerably. It was the consequence of being set up in a lake; cooler days, but also cooler nights. It was earlier that night when Gwen had once again gone looking for a first aid kit after sending the campers to their tents. David caught up to her and noticed how she hid her hand in her shirt. Now here they are, standing in the cold in front of the shared cabin.

“It's fine,” Gwen didn't make eye contact with David, turning her hand to look down at her finger again. She winced as she peeled away the end of her shirt from against her bloody nail. It was a lot worse than she thought it would be. Only some of the blood had soaked through and her finger still bled profusely.

This was the first time that she really took time to look at her hands. She didn't say anything for a moment, looking down and flexing her fingers in front of her, as if testing them. David watched her, his hands up, but not moving. Gwen stared down at her bleeding finger, no longer bothering to cover it. Her nails had grown ragged. She could almost see underneath of them. Points of skin around her nails were dead and hard, especially at the corners of her nails. She hadn't paid attention to the fact that she had started biting her skin, too.

“Gwen?” David’s voice was strained. He lowered his hands slightly as Gwen quickly lifted her gaze, holding eye contact with him.

“Oh, shit,” Gwen laughed softly through those words. She looked down at her nails and then back up at David.

“Please, let me see your hands?” David’s voice was soft, his hands still outstretched. He turned them so his palms were facing upwards I'm front of her.

Gwen was silent. She held eye contact with David, almost completely zoning out. Losing herself in the fact that although he was still smiling, it wasn't as bright as his smiles usually were. Concern darkened his face and he looked tired.

“Gwen,” David’s voice brought her back and she flinched slightly. His eyes widened as her hands twitched. His gaze fell to the ground before rising to her face again. “I want to help you. Please?”

Reluctantly, Gwen let go of her shirt. David tilted his hands toward her welcomingly. Gwen rolled her eyes before laying her hands palms down on top of his. David smiled again, but it wasn't the usual overexcited smile he showed the campers. This smile was softer, more comforting. Gwen followed David as he led her by the hands towards the desk they usually reserved for paperwork or anything they just didn't have room for. Mostly, that would just be the novels and magazines that Gwen kept.

Gwen stood at the table as David dropped one of her hands and flipped open the first aid kit that sat on top of a mess of loose papers. Still holding Gwen's right hand, he rummaged around inside of the container. His smile had disappeared to give way to a look of blank concentration.

“Oh geez,” David mumbled. “We're going to need to clean your hand and stop the bleeding. Here, hold this to your nail.” He handed her a clean cloth and she took it, lifting her hands away from his and pressing her nail into the material. She watched as the white tissue was stained red around her finger. David pulled out the desk chair and smiled at Gwen expectantly. A pang of something warm flashed through her before she stiffened again.

“I can do this myself,” Gwen mumbled.

“I want to help you,” David’s voice was still sweet, despite the difficulty Gwen was giving him. The same warmth rose through Gwen and she looked down.

“Thanks, David.”

Despite looking away, she could still see how thanking David made him light up from head to toe. “You're welcome, Gwen!” He responded in his usual upbeat voice before quieting down again, as if trying to back away before she became annoyed with him. Gwen felt herself sink into the seat, almost ashamed. David was trying so hard to help her and cheer her up and here she was treating him like an inconvenience.

Turning her hand back, Gwen looked down at her thumb. It was still bleeding, but a bit less so. She turned the cloth over and pressed it back to her broken skin.

“You shouldn't bite your nails,” David said. Gwen was about to snap and interrupt him with some sort of sarcastic quip, but he continued talking before she could. “It's tough, I know,” he breathed in. “Well, not really, but I understand enough to know that you would've stopped already if it was that easy.” A short silence. “You could get sick, Gwen, or end up with an infection.”

It was odd hearing David speak so matter-of-factly. All the usual light in his voice had ebbed away. He was legitimately concerned for Gwen and it showed in the softness of his eyes and the slight curve of his mouth as he frowned.

“I'm hoping that maybe I can help you,” David smiled again, but still softly. “I'm positive you can do it,” his voice gradually regained its usual light. “You just need a little push, that's all!”

Despite herself, Gwen smiled, too. She dipped her head forwards, something in the back of her head saying that she shouldn't be thinking about how sweet David was to her at this time. That's what came with the “CBFL” title, after all; an unending amount of love and affection from a hyperactive coworker. David practically exuded sunshine from his pores, he was just that positive. As exhausting as it was, Gwen had grown attached to that aspect of him. The ability to always find the bright side was one she envied, and there were times where she wished that some of his energy would find her as well.

“Alright, David,” Gwen nodded, smiling slightly. “I appreciate it.”