Forever Always

Ch. 1 - Because Society Told Me So.

Note: I'm not really good at writing first chapters to my books but I will say that, once characters are introduced, the chapters will become more exciting. Also keep in mind that this chapter consists a lot of talk about the characters view upon her life. Meaning it will sound very depressing and may not be as interesting to some people. However, that isn't the only thing that happens. So please support the chapter that way I can keep writing.

-Chapter 1-

Just by first glance, you might think that something is always wrong with me. That I'm always depressed and angry. Maybe I give a vibe that I hate everyone around me and prefer a life where I am the only one to exist; maybe you think I go home every afternoon, fight with my parents, smoke some weed, and think about suicide. About 60% of that might be true. There are days when I want to just be alone and not eventually get emotionally scarred by some boy I can't get my mind off of, or a friend that stabs me in the back and spreads rumors about how I cheated on my ex. It's very preachy and it seems like I'm bitching and moaning about this, but it's just how I feel about all of it. I'm not saying that there isn't other people around me that feels this way. Actually, most of my closest friends feel the same way. I'm just saying that this how I feel, and this is how I view the world I live in. It tells us it's okay to speak our minds and let it all out to the ones that care; however, once you let your heart out to someone, you risk the chance of getting judged and neglected. In some ways, it works. Like when someone has a racist or homophobic comment, you have the power to call that person out and say, "That's not nice," or ,"Why do you have so much hate?"
For me, I don't hate.

I just hope for better things to come..

On Saturday afternoons, when I'm not being forced to go to college, I like to go to the tallest building in my area; and, look down upon the city/town as the sun sets, and the lights begin to light up. While I do this, I might blast emotional something through my apple earbuds to get even more symbolic and cliche. It's VERY cliche. By all means. But. Why not? Cliches can be good. Its my way of coping with reality. Romance novels, video games, movies: they all understand what I want in my cliches.

Eventually, at some points while I'm looking at this view, people come across me. They ask me if I'm okay, they look at me in confusion and worried expressions, or they just move on and guess that I have issues. All this because, when I look at this beautiful sight, I begin to cry. Memories and flashbacks of my past starts to repress. Thinking of my rough childhood, my dad leaving me, the drama at school, my sisters and brothers leaving me, and my step-dad getting deported back to Mexico. These all come back to me, when I have a moment of silence; and, a chance to look at something greater than myself. Later it would be time for me to go home; but, I'm wasn't ready to go just yet. Sometimes I like to hide in areas in the building, where no one can find me, and wait till the coast is clear for me to go back to my specific spot and look over the city at night time. I know it was trespassing and illegal, but my rebellious side didn't care about that as much. Besides, I have done this so many times; and, I have never gotten caught once. If the security guards ever spot me they would never catch up to me because of how fast I was. This time, however, I came to find a young security guard waiting for my arrival. At first glance, it was obvious that this guy was athletic, so there was only one way out of this.

I had to run my little ass out of there as fast as I can.

I quickly hid my face with my hoodie, as I ran out of the glass room and headed for the elevator across the hallway. The S.G chased after me yelling, "Halt! Stop right there!" But I didn't hesitate to stop, hence I ran until I ran out of stamina. Luckily this happened once I entered the elevator and pushed on the button that took me to the roof of the building.