I Don't Know

I don't know why I wake up
When I don't want to be awake,
I don't know why I hold on
When sooner or later, I'll break,
I don't know why I go on
When all I want to do is stop,
I don't know why I keep climbing up
When every part of me wants to drop,
I don't know why I can't put into words
This feeling I feel everyday,
I don't know what's the reason
For this price I've been made to pay,
I don't know why I feel helpless
When so many want to help,
I don't know how many others
Have gone through this and how they dealt,
I don't know how many lost
And how many overcame,
I don't know whether I'll overcome
Or lose to the numbness and pain,
I don't know why I hide it
Or how long I can push it aside,
I don't know why I lie to the world
And since when I died inside,
I don't know why I've succumbed
To my own internal oppression,
I don't know why I fight the fight
In which I lose against depression.