Why is it that you'd have the guts to kill urself, but not have the guts to live? Why is it that u got a somewhat perfect life and yet u feel like giving up just right there. When you either have regret dying there in ur own pool of blood, or dying just from something you never wanted to happen to you. Sometimes I feel that people don't understand how we feel. Or even us. Sometimes people see that u are struggling under the surface. Sometimes when they look down, at the surface and the edge of the water. They only see their own reflection because they were too late to give that hand out. Sometimes, when u keep a secret for too long, it starts to kill you. It knaws ur teeth, ur bones, ur muscles, ur heart, and ur soul. It feels as if the world around you just gave up on you. Or either that u gave up on the world. And at the end, when u or the world gives up on you, u just want to think that hey, u can keep fighting. Life is valuable and u must keep it, cuz everyone got purpose in this life. Even when u don't find that purpose, it will come to you in the end. Even near ur own death. Life can nurture you, yet it hurts you. Sometimes u want to keep fighting, but other times you just want to give up because it's just too much pain to bear. If we were to resurrect, we would have died a thousand times. Sometimes I think why life is like this. Just the pain u gotta bear when ur starting out life, and coming back from it. I don't understand hinge that I've seen, but now that I see them, I have regret about understanding them, sometimes I just wonder why we people think like this. Idk why i think these things too. I just hope someone hears my words. Idk how life can be such a struggle and others have it the easy way out. And when they see us, they think we must be insane. They're the insane ones because they think that this life is perfect when this world is hell. But honestly, if I have the guts to die, why don't I have the guts to just live?
