may aura
the next night i didn't get any sleep. i was rolling in between my sheets and my mind was replaying the conversation with my brother over and over.
it was becoming a nightmare.
i turned around and looked at the clock on my nightstand.
3:12 am
the comfort of grayson's hoodie was warm against my pale skin and it smelled like him, making me calm instantly. i closed my eyes in the hopes of falling asleep, and eventually i did.
the sun was peeking through my curtains in the morning, leaving red spots on my cheek and neck. i sat up on my bed and rubbed my eyes and neck, checking my phone for any messages or calls from my brother.
nothing.
i closed my phone and stood up, rolled my curtains up so i could see the busy city of new jersey in the morning.
i left the window and changed my clothes into some black shorts and a white tank top, brushing my hair through and pressing my glasses against my nose.
the morning was quiet, i was sitting at my desk, drawing. i was finishing it up when i heard a knock on my door.
i turned around and yelled "come in!"
the door opened and a tall, feminine girl with long healthy brunette hair stepped inside. she was wearing ripped black jeans with a cropped hoodie on her perfectly tanned skin. her face was framed with light freckles and she had a backpack leaning on her left shoulder.
she couldn't do anything when i already jumped out of my chair yelling "get out!" multiple times.
"may, please, let me-"
"no! get out!" i was shaking out of pure anger towards this girl, how dare she just waltz in after two years?
"may, ple-" she pleaded but i didn't let her finish.
"what is there to explain? you left me. you left me when i needed you the most, but why was i surprised? everyone always leaves me, sooner or later! for the lo-"
she cut me off "may calm down, i'm here now."
"now? now? you're-" i stopped before i would say something i would regret.
"what do you mean?"
i didn't answer, i just shook my head and turned my back to her, facing the window. i heard her stepping closer to me, so i turned around and looked her dead in the eyes.
"why now? why not sooner?" i asked her, my voice lower than it was before.
"i came to my senses, and realized how horrible i was for leaving you." she said and rubbed the back of her neck.
"yeah, no shit." i rolled my eyes.
"why are you here?" i continued.
"i wanted to..be best friends again." she said and smiled. i furrowed my eyebrows.
"you think this is a joke right? you think i can just forget everything and go back to being best friends? you have NO idea how horrible it has been for me since you just decided to leave because you 'couldn't handle being with me' or how 'problematic' i was." i said, mimicking her.
she just looked at the floor in silence.
"please leave." i then said and pointed at the door.
"please, let me make it up to you-"
"-leave."
we just stood there, in my room, in silence. we looked at eachother, her naked eyes filled with regret and mine with hatred. then the door opened.
"may, can i-oh, sorry.." he stepped inside and noticed me and bella standing in the room. bella's eyes immediately lit up and she turned around.
"ohmygosh, may, how is grayson dolan in here?" she said with a high pitched voice and stepped closer to him.
i have never been more confused in my life. how did bella know grayson's name?
she started asking for pictures and basically fangirl over him. after she was done she came up to me and gave me a crumbled piece of paper with her number on it. i threw it in the trash after she closed the door behind her.
"what was that?" i asked grayson when he sat on my bed.
"can i use your phone really quickly?" he asked. i gave him my phone and my passcode, crossing my arms on my chest. what is he doing?
he soon gave me the phone and my eyes widened.
"why didn't you tell me?" i asked, a smile forcing its way to my face.
a youtube channel with four million subscribers?
"i guess it didn't come up in conversations." he laughed and tapped the spot next to him, so i sat down next to him.
"who was that girl in your room earlier?"
"an old friend."
he furrowed his eyebrows, implying for me to tell more.
"she left me when i told her my mom passed away and that i have..leukemia." my weak voice trailing off.
his eyes widened "what? why?"
"she apparently couldn't handle being with me since i was so problematic and-and.."
a single tear rolled down my cheek and as soon he noticed it, he wrapped his warm hands around my body and held me in his embrace without letting go.
"i have your hoodie in my closet, i'll give it back to you." i said, but when i tried to escape his embrace, his grip just tightened and he whispered "please don't, it looks better on you."
