The ovary fic.

Pussy pop

So there I was, again tonight forcing laughter faking smiles. Same old lonely place, wait... isn't this the beginning to that one Taylor Swift song? (Enchanted), anyways. Brendon made me go to a fucking party. It was awful. He always got drunk and fucked this dude named Dallon... ugh that Tall handsome motherfucker. (Quite literally, brendon had my babies, but that's a different story)
They were currently fucking on the futon... in the living room... where the party was happening... and people were encouraging it.
So while Dallon was balls deep into Brendon's anus, I decided to go somewhere more fun.

A strip club.

Now, I'm not an expert at going to strip joints, but... wait what am I talking about? I used to be a fucking stripper, I AM AN EXPERT. And not to toot my own horn, but I am VERY good on the pole ;)

So I went over to Brendon, slapped his left cheek, and bit his right one, which only turned him on more, so he asked for a threesome which I (hesitantly) turned down and ran to the store, to prepare for the strip club.

When I got to the store I got a shopping cart, and headed straight to the snack isle. Where the GODLY liquid gold was. Cheese whiz. This old lady came up to me and totally ruined my cheese vibes tho, she said "hello young lady, do you know where the finger chips are?" And I looked at her pretty. Oddly. And said "uh... no but I got cheese whiz?" And she burped and quickly ran off... weird...

I threw all of the jars of the precious liquid and all of the spray cans of it into my cart, and headed to the cash register and quickly pulled out my I.D card and showed the lady at the register my card. "Ma'am I'm Ryan Ross, of panic! At the disco, fuck off please gimme whiz ok byeeee" I ran out with the cart and rode in it to the strip club, which was conveniently placed right beside the grocery store...

When I (literally) rolled into the club, everyone recognized me. I heard "oo, aaah, that's Ryan Ross, the whiz queen" and many other variations of that. They knew.

I quickly put on my masquerade mask, so if Brendon came looking for me he wouldn't know me, and poured the whiz all over the floor, as far as the eye could see, and I ripped my clothes off, and covered my nipples and cock in squirtable cheese whiz.

I was ready.

To be continued...