Chocolate for cowards

Chapter 3: Old visions reflected in raindrops

Rain started to pour heavily on the streets. Groups of people carrying their umbrellas filled them. Rina glanced outside, noting the flow of the raindrops that landed on the glass windows of her room. Rain was something for her. Even if Mami doesn’t care so much about the weather, Rina on the other hand, just loves the times with rain falls.

As a child, Rina didn’t like rain. In fact, she once loathed it. She couldn’t play with her brothers and sisters outside. They also had to move the laundry inside, and their clothes won’t dry as fast as in a sunny day. But as she reached adulthood, she started to love it. The rain reminded her of so many things. Things that made her happier than she’d ever imagine.

== Rewind: Two and a half years ago ==

It was a cold rainy afternoon when Rina first noticed Mami. They always board the train on the same train station, but they have different stops. Mami leaves the train first, two stops before Rina’s destination.

She can’t help but smile the first time she saw the blonde playing a game in her Nintendo DS while riding the train. Rina speculated for Mami to be around her age, and it’s not every day that one can see someone around her age to be playing console games, especially a girl. Weird as Mami may appear on the outside as her getup totally screamed “otaku”, she totally grabbed Rina’s attention.

For Rina, Mami had a certain air of mystery that triggered her curiosity. She wanted to approach the girl that was so busy paying her full attention to her DS.

At first, it was just curiosity. When she first took notice of Mami, she thought she’d never see the girl again. She was just amused at being able to see something different in her usual landscape. It was just all work and home. Life was starting to bore her. She tried attending mixers and such, but she couldn’t find herself enjoying those things. Also her close friends are slowly starting to live their own lives. Rina couldn’t help but feel left out.

But after several train trips later, she noticed that they are boarding the train on the same train station, almost at the same time. Too bad that they have different stops. All Rina would try to do was look for her while lining up at the train station platform. There are times that she can’t see Mami and she had to board the train already. She somehow feels lonely whenever that happens.

“Just what am I doing?” Rina asked herself, after finally thinking back to her actions. The setup is practically hopeless. Waiting around the train won’t really do anything. She doesn’t have the courage anymore to approach the mysterious girl. All she wanted to do as of late was just look at Mami from afar.

“I’m just being afraid. I know,” Rina continued to talk to herself. Who wouldn’t be? It was like uncharted territory for her. Even if she can muster the courage to approach the girl, what would they be talking about? Video games? Well, she had a bit of knowledge on that, but she doesn’t know the details. Plus she had already stopped playing. Anime? She knows the popular ones, but what if Mami is a hardcore fan? She doesn’t even know the story arcs or the entire roster of characters. Manga? She barely reads them, along with the light novels. Somehow, deep inside, Rina felt like she was missing something. Maybe this mysterious girl caught her attention so much because this girl isn’t afraid to show people what she likes. Maybe Rina was just jealous of her on that aspect.

Rina always stood like a pillar for her siblings. She’s the eldest after all. She had to be upright and mature. She had to handle everything for her siblings. Her brothers and sisters adore her for that. Her parents are proud of her for that. But somewhere along the line, Rina forgot something important. Her own self.

What does she want to do anyway? She knows she can’t stay in this routine forever. At the back of her mind, Rina knows there is more to this routinary lifestyle of hers.