Chapter Five - Wishes and Letters

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Over the next few months, Atara became their sole companion and friend. Stefan loved her company, and enjoyed finding similarities between her and his mother; at least, what he remembered of her. They both scrunched up their noses when deep in thought; they both had an appetite for tender rabbit meat, which Stefan thought was disgusting; and they both loved the ocean with a passion.

However, they were vastly different when it came to reactions. When Torin scraped his knee, Mother would have simply washed it with soap and water, kissed the pain away, and said, "Go run off and play now." Atara insisted on thoroughly cleansing the cuts with antiseptic and bandaging it, all the while asking Torin, "Does it hurt very bad?"

Mother had never liked animals very much, horses being the exception, since she'd grown up with them, but Atara loved creatures. She, Stefan and Torin spent hours at the Forum stables, playing with the tamed wolves and the terripi, horses with massive wings; stroking the occasional tame hawk's feathers and feeding fish to the big, gentle cats.

Whereas Mother hadn't liked to travel, Atara was excited about seeing new places. When Mem was tied up with kitchen duties, Atara took it upon herself to entertain the boys, and took them to places all over southern Erestor.

When summer gave them extra hours of daylight and the glorious sunshine that Stefan loved so much, they visited Three Falls, a spectacular triple waterfall near the Tisidon border. One windy weekend, they roamed the plains to the East, and saw the caves in the Crimson Mountains north of Semora. Atara even booked a short passage to an island that was an hour out to sea, simply to show the boys wildlife that they would never have seen on the mainland. Even though Torin got seasick and threw up, Stefan thought he'd never had a more wonderful time in his life.

He just wished that Father would agree to join them. Even now, he sat cooped up all day in his study, doing heaven knew what, and still, he barely talked to his sons.

Why can't he see that Atara would make a perfect mother for us? Stefan thought multiple times.

Finally, he grew tired of thinking it so much and decided he would be more direct. He and Atara were in the palace gardens one August afternoon, picking fresh flowers for the bouquets, when he blurted, "Do you think you could marry my father?"

It caught her so off guard that for a moment, she just stared at him. He reddened, feeling the tips of his ears burn. Then, she burst out laughing; a full, hearty laugh. "Stefan, what on earth would make you say that?" she asked through her giggles.

He flushed even harder. "I... I don't know. I think you'd make a good mother."

At this, Atara became serious. She set her bouquet of lilies aside and knelt to his level. "Thank you, for your confidence in me, Stefan. It means more than you know. I'm touched that you see me as such." A tiny smile touched her lips. "But perhaps you didn't know that I am only twenty-one years old."

Stefan was puzzled. What did that have to do with anything?

Shrugging, he said, "Why does that matter?"

That made her chuckle again. "Because your father is twelve years older than I."

He stared at her. "Mother was six years younger than Father."

"Yes, but that's twice as short." She patted his cheek, her face turning solemn. "I know what you wish for, but sometimes, what we want is not what the Master has intended for us."

Stefan's hopes fell. "I know."

Were those... tears that he saw in her eyes? He wasn't certain, but they were gone just as quickly.

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