Memories

Fifteen

No matter how things have turned out, I still and will always miss you.

As days continued to pass by painfully slow, I realized humans didn't just crave company, but it was more of a necessity. We would definitely die from hunger and thirst, but loneliness could kill too. Being cooped up in our house for too long wasn't too healthy for me, even if Alicia or Erik visited occasionally.

There were things a parent could never tell their children after all.

It wasn't a matter of trust but as parents, we would never want to burden them with what they didn't need to know. My days weren't long but theirs are still a number to go. They didn't need to carry what I had carried for so long.

Humans may be intelligent and independent creatures, but in the end we are still animals. We flock together, we find company, and we seek understanding.

I kicked a pebble to the side of the path and continued walking down the path. Grayish-blue sky, humid air, no sun visible. It wasn't the perfect day for a walk in the park and it wouldn't be weird if it rained anytime later, but a phone call from Tom had managed to drag me out.

I didn't know how much I craved company until my phone rang and my heart informed me of its desire.

Surprisingly, even with an age gap of 18 years, we had quite similar interests. I wouldn't say we click instantly, but we warmed up to each other faster than we usually do, considering how we were both reserved people.

After a short stroll, we sat down together on a bench near the lake.

"Thanks for the call today. It's refreshing to finally come out for some air with great company. What made you decide to call though?"

A smile ghosted Tom's face, but it only made him look sad more than anything. "I just had too much at work these past few weeks. I feel like crumbling when I got home and realized it was my mom's death anniversary today." He paused for a little while, as though letting that statement sink in. Then, he took off his glasses and rubbed his eyes. "All the stress got to me but I can't believe I forgot about it."

I placed a hand on his shoulder firmly. "It's okay. I'm sure she would understand. It's enough that you still remember her all the time."

Tom lowered his hands and glanced up at me. "Would she?"

Unlike his usual aloof, gentle and confident self, for once he looked so exhausted and lost. Like he needed some kind of assurance and hope to be lit in his heart again.

I nodded firmly. "What more can you do for the dead aside from remembering them? By reliving the moments you had with them, it's as though you're making them come to life again. And if the people I love would do that when I have passed on, I'd be contented."

Silence settled in as we stared out at the lake. It was serene, even with kids shouting behind us, teens giggling away a little distance away and the sounds of people jogging.

The park was so full of life, and that won't ever change. The only change would be the people who come here. Over the years, new people will fill up this place, while the people that we see now will be gone and eventually leave the world permanently.

The world couldn't remember every single person. Their traces in this world will vanish eventually. But humans are such magical beings. We may die the next day, but surely, all the days we lived were not wasted if someone remembered you. For the things you had done for them, the emotions they had felt when they were with you, and the shared memories, no matter bitter or sweet.

Humans continue to live on in one another.

Remembering the dead is the only thing we can do, but that's all that they need.