What's up y'all, my name is Danaé Reed and I'm about to tell y'all the story of my love life.
I️ts long so get comfortable.
Growing up I️ always knew I️ was different than most girls my age. I️ was more mature. I️ mean that in every way. My body matured faster than most girls my age. I️ came out of the womb a 50 year old woman. All the kids in kindergarten and first grade would always say they wanted to be lawyers, doctors and usual things when they got older. Me on the other hand, my answer was simple, a wife. Yes, I️ wanted to be a wife. Everything that came along with being a wife, I️ wanted it. Having children, keeping the house clean and together for when my husband got home from work. Of course I️ was laughed at. Even got a letter sent home with me asking my parents why I would say something so "ridiculous". I'll be 24 very soon and still don't understand how that's even remotely close to being "ridiculous" but, I️ digress.
I️ started a "very serious relationship" at the extremely young age of 11. I️ had claimed to be "in love" with this boy named Moonie I had met at my moms church. He was tall, of the lighter complexion and had braids. Did I️ mention he was two years older than me? At the time that was frowned upon. We would pass notes and little messages between people. I️t was very seldom we actually spoke face to face. That went on for about 6 months. Moonie lived with his father and step mother. Moonie wasn't the best behaved young man so he was in trouble a lot. His father would beat on him and Moonie felt like his dad was choosing his "new family" over him. Moonie's dad got tired of trying to discipline him so he sent him back to Atlanta to live with his mother. Moonie and I️ lost contact shortly after. He would call my moms phone and ask to speak to me. I️ thought he had forgot all about me until I️ heard my mom answer the phone one day.
"Hello"
"Hello Ms. Michelle, it's Moonie, may I️ please speak with Danaé?"
"I️ keep telling you she's not going to talk to you! You're no good for my daughter and I️ wish you'd stop calling my phone"
"I️ don't understand why I️ can't just speak with her for at least five minutes Sister Caldwell but, I️t is your phone and I️ have no choice but to respect what you say. Just tell her I️ called please and thank you"
I️ immediately felt my heart drop to my stomach and ran to my room. I️ cried in my bed for at least two days before Kamiyah, one of my little sisters, came in my room to see if I️ was okay. She told me not to worry about I️t and to think that if it's meant to be then I️t will be no matter what.
I️ never ever forgot about Moonie. Moonie didn't break my heart so I️ never considered I️t my first heart break.
The end of 8th grade year was when I️ experienced my first heart break. His name was Romell Willis. He wasn't the cutest boy in school but he was nice and respectful.
I️ was in 7th grade and he was in 6th grade. I️ was new in town and once again, my body was more mature than most girls my age so I️ got a lot of attention from boys. I️ wasn't really focused on school like I️ should have been, so I️ had to repeat 7th grade.
I️ had broke my ankle three days before school started back up so walked in school on crutches! Everybody was being nice, helping me and making sure I️ was okay so I️ wasn't thinking he was flirting with me. He would help on and off the cheese bus and tell me to call him if I️ needed help with anything during school. I️ would just laugh and call him a little boy because I️ thought he was younger than me. He was not. After about 2 months of him flirting with me I️ called him on the phone one night to just have a little conversation and I️ was lit because my mom gave me permission. We talked all night until my mom told me to get off the phone. The next day at school there was a note in my locker asking me to be his girlfriend! I️ didn't think twice and said yes. Every day there was something for me at my locker from him. We went on dates, with one of our parents there of course, but they were really fun. He was funny, charming and sweet. He never acted different in front of his friends or family. I️ felt that he really cared for me! Even bought me a promise ring and a matching necklace, his mom obviously bought I️t we were in 8th grade!
One day, and I️ will never forget this day, I️ didn't come to school because I️ had the flu. The only person that checked on me that day was my best friend at the time, Deonna Johnson. Romell didn't call at all. So the following day I️ went to school and there was nothing at my locker. I️ acted like I️t didn't phase me at all and went inside my classroom.
*One thing you will notice about me is that I️ truly despise showing any type of vulnerability*
He tried to get inside my class to talk to me but my English teacher knew that he didn't check on me, so she wouldn't let him in.
Word gets around fast when your best friend idolizes Perez Hilton. Plus I️t was 2008... go figure.
After English class was lunch and I️ knew I'd see him and he wanted my attention so I️ put on lots and lots of lip gloss and made sure my hair was laid and my clothes was nice too.
I️ got to the cafeteria and he met me at the door. He immediately started to plead his case and say his mom wouldn't let him use the phone because him and his little brother Tye were fighting and for me not to believe what people are telling me about the day before.
I had NO IDEA what had happened the day before while I was hole sick. I️ asked him three times to tell me before I️ heard I️t form anyone else and wouldn't tell me. I️ walked away from him, got my lunch and sat at the table with my friends. They all told me that Romell and this girl Destiny were kissing outside the gym before dismissal.
I️ felt my heart rip into pieces. I️ didn't even eat my lunch but once again, I️ played cool and acted perfectly normal. On the inside, I️ was DYING! Felt like my heart had been ripped out of my chest.
I️ don't know if I️t was:
1. The fact that he did I️t
2. He did I️t, and lied to my face
3. He did I️t and didn't tell me
4. He did I️t and I️ had to find out from Hamlin Park news committee
Had I️ been there would that have still happened?
Does I️t happen all the time because we were in different classes and I️ don't monitor his every move?
I️ had so many questions. I️ went from blaming myself to being mad at him back to being mad at myself and then being mad at him. I️ felt like I️ was lost!
Boy was I️ naive!
We tried to make I️t work after graduating 8th grade and went to high school but I️t wasn't happening. He had found him a new girl and I️ also had someone to take my mind of off him.
I️ met Damien Green through one of my classmates, Ashlee Cornelius. See, I️ went to a Performing Arts school, I️ can sing I️ guess and we're all kind of weird there. Ashlee just walked up to me and started talking to me one day and me being me, I️ went with it. From that day on we were stuck like glue to each other. She introduced me to her nephew, yes nephew, Damien. He was really tall, of the darker complexion and really thin. He was attractive to me and also attracted to me. We were boyfriend and girlfriend for about 6 months. In that short amount of time so much had happened to me. My uncle died, I️ lost virginity and also got caught in the act by his parents! We had a couple moments that made me think "Maybe this could be I️t"
Again, was I️ naive!
Damien had some issues that I️ chose to overlook due to my attraction to him and also me not wanting to be alone at the time. I️ settled.
One day, at Ashlee's house we were sitting at this long dinner table- Ashlee's mom was also a foster mother- and Damien and I️ had just got into an argument about a girl calling him baby on MySpace AND on Facebook. All I️ did was ask who she was and he thought I️ was "questioning his character". I️ should have been after what happened next.
Ashlee's mom was asking Damien how school when and why his school called and said he missed a class but he was in school.
I️ immediately knew exactly what he was doing that causes him to miss class. He proceeded to tell her how he got tied up at his previous class and was helping a new student find her classes.
I️ looked up at him and I️ guess that look infuriated him.
Damien reached across the table and slapped me and tried to grab me over the table! I️ jumped up and over the table onto his lap punching him and slapping him in his face.
"Don't put your FUCKING hands on me you lying, cheating, no good..." ... you can fill in those blanks. I️ was 14 and my boyfriend had slapped me. I️ only saw things like this on TV and only IMAGINED what I'd do in that situation. I️ then knew what I'd do in that situation. I️ flipped out, apologized to Ashlee and her mother and walked home. I️t was quite a walk but I️ was so pissed I️ didn't care. Once I️ got home I️ called my father.
See, my father raised me and one thing he taught me was "If someone puts their hands on you, you hit them back but make I️t hurt 10 times worse"
I️ made sure with all the might inside my 5 foot 1 inch 158 pound body that man felt what he did to me 10 times worse. Me and Ashlee were still friends but I️ never heard from Damien again.
I️ was single for almost eight months before I️ met Tanisha ... Tanisha Brown. My life changed drastically from here!
